


We're Almost Free

by EvilRegalOutlaw (youfixedmybrokenwings)



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Dimples Queen, F/M, Fucking Cora, Outlaw Queen - Freeform, fucking Leopold, only in the last few though, the Merry Men are here too, why am I so horrible to my favourite characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-03
Updated: 2016-03-14
Packaged: 2018-05-24 12:32:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 44,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6153864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youfixedmybrokenwings/pseuds/EvilRegalOutlaw
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sick of a life she has no wish to live and still grieving the love she lost, Regina makes a run for it. Will a chance encounter with a merry thief change her life or will Cora still catch up to her? T just to be safe.<br/>Set 2x02 and carries on from there.<br/>Also on Wattpad: https://www.wattpad.com/story/16032272-we%27re-almost-free-outlawqueen</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is copied straight across from my Wattpad account as originally published, so any mistakes in spelling, punctuation, grammar or plot are entirely the fault of beta-less sixteen-going-on-seventeen-year-old me.

Regina burst, sobbing, into the stables, tacked up Jerry and led him out of his stall in record time. She walked calmly, as if going for a leisurely ride, until they were out of sight of the palace, when she mounted and kicked him into a canter. She stayed close to the trees, turning into the woods as soon as she found an opening, and cantered on. The tears were now flowing thickly down her face, and she had to trust that Jerry wouldn't trip or try to return. Branches caught at her clothes and hair but she bent low over his neck and ignored them.

"Woah, there!" A voice called out, causing Jerry to almost skid to a halt, the spring showers making the ground slippery. Regina, who hadn't been expecting it in the slightest, went catapulting forward, completely losing her dignity as she tumbled off. She braced herself for the hard ground, but she never reached it. Instead, she found herself being held in a pair of strong arms, looking up into the blurred face of a man, probably a hunter by the bow strung across his shoulder. He set her down graciously before asking,

"Milady, are you all right?"

"I'm fine." She brushed herself down, hastily wiping away her tears and forcing down the now constant anger.

"You're injured." He gestured towards her left side, and Regina looked down to see a sharp twig had ripped a large hole in her sleeve and left a long cut right down her forearm.

"It's nothing."

"No, it's not. It could get infected and then where would you be?" He looked at her with the sure expression of someone who knows they are right. It infuriated her slightly, but she had to admit the truth of his observation. She grabbed Jerry's bridle and pushed the man off the path, further into the forest.

"Be quick. Someone's after me, if they find you they'll think you're helping me."

"But I am..."

"You know what I mean."

"Put your hand on your right shoulder. Reduces the blood flow," he said in response to her quizzical look. He took a lotion of some sort out of his pocket, dabbing it on before binding the cut up with a handkerchief. Regina hissed as the potion stung her arm.

"That should stop it getting infected. You never know what's been on that branch."

"Thank you, err..."

"Robin of Locksley, at your service."

"Well, thank you, Robin of Locksley. Now, I really must be going."

"Do I get nothing in return?" She wasn't sure if he was jesting so she decided to play along.

"As you can see, I haven't got much," she indicated her small shoulder bag, the only luggage it had been safe to bring.

"No. Your name."

"Sorry?"

"Your name." he repeated as if it was the most normal thing in the world to ask for. "I gave you mine, it's only fair I should know yours."

"What if you try and stalk me? Kidnap me?"

"Why would I do that?"

"You are an outlaw."

"I may steal, but I use none of it. I give it all to the poor and make my own way honestly." Regina was stumped. The hurt look in his eyes embarrassed her and all the anger at her mother, which usually would have come up with a cutting reply, failed her with a response. Turning away served the double purpose of remounting and hiding her blush, but then she spotted someone through a gap in the bush they were behind. Recognising her mother, she pulled Robin down to crouch with her behind Jerry, placing a finger on his lips to keep him quiet. Regina listened with bated breath until she was sure her mother was gone.

"And anyway," he continued as soon as she relaxed, "I'm pretty sure you could outride my entire band."

Regina ignored him. "Remember when I said someone was after me? That was her."

"What did she do to you that made you hate her so much?" She hesitated. Her walls were still up and she didn't like to trust anyone any more. Plus just the sight of her mother was enough to make her blood boil.

"Please forgive me when I say I can't trust you. I once trusted someone with a secret very close to my heart, and it ended with the death of the one man I've ever loved."

"I'm sorry."

"I would say it's all right, but what happened after made it very not all right, if you see what I mean."

"Could you trust me with that?"

"Let's just say a marriage that's agreeable to every party but myself." Why was she telling him this? Regina knew she was in danger of crying, or worse, telling him the whole story, if she carried on so she changed the subject. "How well do you know these woods?"

"Very well, I've lived almost my whole life here. We also travel a lot for fear of getting caught so we know all its little secrets."

"We?"

"Me and my band of Merry Men. I consider them my family, as I don't remember any other."

"I'm sorry."

"What is there to be sorry for?"

"I don't know...look, I'm sorry to be a pain but could you show me the way to the nearest border? I need to get away from this marriage, I'll die if I have to go through with it!"

"Of course. It'll take a few weeks, a month or two at most, but you'll have us to protect you."

"Are you sure they won't mind?"

"Of course not! They're all gentlemen, they wouldn't be here if they weren't." He smiled. "Come, it's getting late and the camp is about a mile away."

"Shall we ride?" Regina mounted swiftly, holding out her arm to Robin. He didn't take it, not right away.

"So what is your name?" Regina smiled at the continuation of their first conversation and decided she could trust him, at least with this.

"Regina." Robin smiled.

"Well then, Regina," he bowed then grasped her arm, using her boot to swing up behind her, "ride on."

Regina kicked Jerry on into a slow trot, watching for any rogue tree roots or hidden streams on the way. Robin held onto the cantle at first, then when the going got rougher and the meagre path petered out he put his arms round her waist. Regina accepted it without question, knowing he was simply trying to stay on, but her heart rate sped up. Only slightly, but it was undeniably quicker. She could feel his muscles through the layers of clothing between them. She was very glad when they rode into a clearing set up as a camp and he dismounted.

"Men! I'd like you to meet a temporary member of our group. This is Regina, and we're going to help her run away." He turned and lifted her down, taking the opportunity to whisper in her ear, "I was allowed to tell them that, right?" She simply nodded, slightly annoyed at his presumption but also trying to suppress the involuntary shiver that shot down her spine.

The men all stood up and doffed their caps as Robin introduced them.

"Little John." A big, burly man, with long dark hair. Regina couldn't help but smile at the irony.

"Friar Tuck." Clearly the religious one of the group.

"Will Scarlett, my cousin." Regina could see the resemblance, and wasn't sure she wouldn't have thought they were brothers had he not introduced him as he did.

"Much, the miller's son." This time, the irony made her grimace inwardly.

"And Richard at the Lee, the runt." He clapped him on the back as Richard pulled a face. She smiled at the injoke.

"It's nice to meet you all. Thank you for letting me join you."

"It's no problem, miss. We're sympathetic to anyone in the same plight as us." Friar Tuck told her.

"Come, milady. Supper looks just about ready and I don't know about you but I'm starving."

Friar Tuck handed round the plates of game stew, and Robin sacrificed his log for her despite her protests. The stew was by far the most delicious dish she had ever tasted. She was quiet as they altered their plans with her in mind, grateful that they were helping a total stranger. She'd always known there was more to the 'commoners' (as her mother called them) than meets the eye, but now she was beginning to think that these outlaws weren't so bad either.

"Right, I suggest we head off early tomorrow, to give us a good start. Regina, you can have...my lean-to, and I'll sleep under the stars. No, I insist. It doesn't look much like rain, I'll be fine." He led her over to one of the little beds. There was a little boy peeping out from underneath his covers, clearly scared but curious. Regina crouched down, memories and crushed hopes flooding back.

"Hello there, young man. What's your name then?"

Robin scooped the boy up. "This is Roland. And he's meant to be asleep."

"I had a bad dream."

"Roland, it wasn't real. Are you all right?" He nodded against his father's shoulder, all the time looking at Regina.

"Papa, who's she?"

"That's Regina. She's going to be coming with us for a bit."

"Is she mama?" Robin looked at her apologetically and Regina's heart ached for the both of them. It was clear what had happened.

"No, I'm afraid she's not. Come on, let's get you back to bed. You don't mind sleeping with him, do you? I'm so sorry, he's too young to be sleeping out in the open."

"Honestly, Robin, it's fine. You're helping me get away, looking after your son during the night is the least I can do."

"Well, there you go, but I warn you, he is a fidgeter."

"I'm a pretty deep sleeper, I'll be fine."

"Goodnight then, Regina." He kissed the top of Roland's head. "And goodnight to you, you young scamp."

"Goodnight, Papa."

Roland snuggled under the covers again, and Regina did the same. She saw Robin lie down near the dying campfire, fighting with herself over whether to sacrifice her blanket or not. Eventually she figured he would be used to it, plus it was nearly summer so blankets were becoming increasingly unnecessary. Roland crept closer to her and laid his head against her shoulder.

"Can you tell me a story?" She looked down at him, well, at the glints of his eyes that were all she could see of him in the dim firelight, taken aback by his immediate trust of someone he'd just met.

"A story? All right, err..." she put her arm round him, thinking up one of the stories she'si heard when she was younger, "Once upon a time..." By the time she was finished, Roland was fast asleep. Fighting the sudden urge to kiss the top of his head, she gazed up at the stars through the gap in the trees. The night air, plus her recent sleepless nights, soon sent her into a deep sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Regina woke early the next morning to gorgeous sunlight filtering through the trees, straight onto her face. It took a couple of seconds for her to remember where she was, but when she did, she felt just a little lighter than she had in a long while. She knew she should be annoyed at having to spend the next couple of weeks with a bunch of strange men and a little boy who looked far too familiar for comfort, but she wasn't. She felt strangely at peace with the world, something she hadn't felt since Daniel passed.

She rose quietly, trying not to disturb the still-sleeping Roland, and withdrew to the little stream nearby to wash her face and untangle her hair, which had come loose in the night. She worked her fingers through, using a calm pool as a makeshift mirror before replaiting it.

A twig snapped behind her and she whipped round, walls snapping up.

"It's only me!" Robin held up his hands in surrender. Regina smiled before picking up the plait where she left off.

"You weren't in the tent, I simply wondered where you were. As the one who agreed to let you join us I feel a responsibility for you."

"Well, you'd be the first."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. It made me more independent, and whether I'm going to be trapped in a loveless marriage or on the run for the rest of my life I need to be. There is, however, always the possibility of my mother finding me, so please don't be offended if I seem touchy." She tied the end off, flicking it back over her shoulder before making to walk past him back to camp.

"Regina, wait." He grabbed her arm gently, stopping her from walking away.

"What is it?" He was standing rather close to her, his clear blue eyes gazing into hers.

"Your sleeve's still ripped."

"Oh."

"Let me mend it for you."

"All right." He drew a needle and thread out of his pocket. Honestly, he seemed to have everything he needed on him at any one time.

He untied the handkerchief he'd used to bind her cut the previous day.

"That's looking good, it should be healed in a few days. Now, hold still." He gently pinched the material together, the needle flying in and out with remarkable speed.

"There, that should do it."

"Who knew a thief could sew?"

"Who knew an upper-class lady could ride like a bandit?" he countered.

Their hands brushed slightly as he ran his hand down her arm to check the stitches. Something compelled her to grip his fingers slightly as she thanked him.

"It's my pleasure, milady." There was a strange look in his eyes. Regina's breath caught in her throat as she recognised that look. It was the look of someone who was still dealing with the loss of a loved one.

They only let go when a voice disturbed the quiet.

"Papa!" They turned to see Roland running at full pelt towards them, his boots undone and only wearing a cloak over his nightgown. Robin grunted as he picked him up.

"Good morning! And how did you sleep? Was Regina all right? Didn't snore?" The last was stage-whispered. The boy giggled and shook his head.

"Thank you for the story, Gina."

"You're very welcome. And it's Regina. Re-gi-na."

"Gina," he insisted, sticking his bottom lip out in a way that made her want to hug him and never let go.

"Story?"

"He couldn't sleep so I told him a fairytale. I think it helped him forget the nightmare because he didn't wake up again. It always helped me as a child."

"I'm grateful. Usually he's up and down like a yo-yo after a nightmare. Aren't you?" He tapped his son's button nose before turning back to Regina. "How would you like to learn to shoot? It could come in very handy, both on our journey and wherever you go after that."

"You do think of everything, don't you? I'd love that."

"Great. Now, I think Friar Tuck's making breakfast, and with seven hungry men to feed I'd get in there quick."

He could see her mentally counting. "Seven?"

"Roland here has quite the appetite. You have no idea how much he can store away in this little body of his."

Regina smiled and went to squeeze past him and the bushes surrounding the clearing, but Roland caught onto her collar, holding his arms out to be held.

"He likes you." Robin commented as he handed him over.

"He's a charming boy." she replied as she settled him on her hip. "You should be proud." She carried Roland over to the fire and set him down. She settled herself on a log to watch over Friar Tuck's shoulder as be blew the fire into life. He was clearly amused by her barely audible gasp as he turned round and asked if she wanted to help.

"No, it's all right. I was forbidden to enter the kitchens at home. I've only ever seen cooking happen on market days, when I would sometimes escape on my horse and go down for a taste of simple life."

"I can teach you a bit, if you like." The burning need to prove herself to her mother made her hesitate. But the logical part of her brain that helped her overcome the anger knew she would need basic skills like this. Who knows where she would end up?

"Thank you, I'd like that."

"All right. First you need to boil the water to get rid of any infection in it. It's a good idea to boil any water from a stream before you drink it, just in case." Regina nodded. "It also helps the vegetables and meat cook faster because it's already up to temperature."

"How do you know - ugh, Roland!" The boy had climbed back onto her lap and was snuggling into her arms. Her chest felt tight but she swallowed it down. "How do you know it's boiling?"

"It'll bubble violently. Now, while you're waiting, you chop up the vegetables and meat. We'll be having the leftover deer from last night." He handed her a bunch of vegetables and Will Scarlett lent her a knife to chop them. She had to push Roland off for fear of cutting him, but as soon as she was done he climbed right back on. Every time she saw him, some of her hatred and resentment melted away. His innocence and childhood wonder at everything around him, plus his unquestioning trust of her was refreshing.

"Right, now get those vegetables in...stir..." After a few minutes of stirring he brought the spoon to his lips and tasted it, nodding with satisfaction.

"Robin! Richard! Breakfast!" Will bellowed across the clearing to the two men by the stream. Regina turned and looked at them, Roland still on her lap already tucking into his.

"Shall we?" Richard gestured for him to go first. Robin sat down on the log next to Regina, who was holding her bowl around Roland and eating over his shoulder.

"Look, if he's being a pain, just push him off."

"It's all right. It's a change, having someone to care for again." Robin looked at her, confused. Regina realised what she'd said and blushed, knowing exactly how it must have sounded. She knew she couldn't let this one slide. She dropped her voice so the laughter of the others drowned her out.

"My mother, she had a son when I was about ten. My nurse became his, but I would do as much as I could to help. Feed him, take him for walks, read to him, you know. But he died suddenly when he was about three."

"I'm sorry. I seem to be saying that to you a lot."

"It's fine. There's no telling what my mother would have made him do to better his position. The thing is..." she paused. Why was she telling him this? She'd only known him a day.

"What is it?"

"I..."

"You don't know or trust me well enough yet." It wasn't a question; his tone was understanding.

She nodded, head bowed. But he didn't press it, and she was intensely grateful.

At that point, Roland had finished and twisted round in Regina's arms to face Robin, making her spill her breakfast slightly. She exclaimed loudly and Robin lifted him off her quickly.

"Now, Roland, that wasn't very nice. Say sorry."

"I'm sorry, Miss Gina." He looked ready to cry. Regina tapped his nose.

"It's all right, it'll wash out. Excuse me."

She went over to her saddle and got out a cloth, dampening it and wiping the food off. It came out easily, but there was now an obvious water stain on her skirt. Trying to arrange the folds so it was hidden, she made her way back. Roland noticed the stain and folded the material over on itself so the mark was hidden. He kept his hand there for the remainder of the meal, even though Robin kept telling him to 'leave the lady alone'.

After breakfast, Regina tacked up Jerry before offering to help Richard fold his lean-to. She was surprised when he spurned her, but went over and took some packages off Much to carry with her. As she stood on tiptoe, strapping them behind the saddle, she saw a very forlorn looking Roland, now dressed, kicking the ground. Going over to him, she asked,

"What's the matter?"

He looked at his boots. They were done up, but loosely and very knotted. His cloak tie was also knotted.

"Papa's busy. He tried to teach me before but I can't do it."

"Look, come over here. Let me show you." She untangled the knots, her nimble fingers managing it in seconds. She tied up his cloak, then did one of his boots slowly, making sure he was concentrating.

"Got it?" He nodded. "Now, you do the other one." She pulled the laces tight and held them in place as he determinedly attempted. After three tries and the knots tighter than ever, tears started to well up.

"Hey, don't cry!" She cupped his cheeks, stroking away the tears with her thumb. "I'll let you into a little secret. I couldn't tie bows until I was eight years old. Once I'm done with you you'll never need help with them again. Come on." She undid the other boot, and did it step-by-step, making him do it at the same time but keeping an elbow on the laces so they were tight enough. When he succeeded, his cheeks dimpled.

"There you go! You see, you can do it. You just need to not give up." All of a sudden he threw himself forward, flinging his arms round her neck.

"Thank you." Regina hugged him back. Her nurse had once told her to always be the last one to let go when hugging a child, as you never know how long they need it; Roland held on for a long while. When he finally pulled away from her, the others were ready to go. He ran over to Robin and tugged his leg, demanding attention. The cart was loaded, the pony harnessed and every quiver of arrows strapped to its respectful shoulder. Regina made her way over to Jerry, checked the girth and straps and mounted.

"Right, let's go." Robin announced. "Westward." Friar Tuck led the pony and cart to the middle of the line, Robin moved up and down to spend time with each of them, Roland shadowing him like a loyal puppy. Little John led the way.

The woods were very thick around this part, so they had to move in single file. Regina stayed near the back with Much and Will, chatting with them and learning about life as an outlaw and getting some tips on what to avoid when setting up camp. She found it fascinating, and by the time it was lunchtime her respect for these men was growing to be higher than for the aristocracy.

Robin held up a hand, halting the line before advancing slowly, his bow raised. It flew with incredible accuracy through the trees, hitting a deer straight in the heart. Three of them went to retrieve and skin it, cutting up the meat into eight packages and wrapping them in leaves.

"We'll cook them when we find a suitable spot." Robin explained to Regina, who couldn't watch. "I'm afraid that's something you'll have to get used to if you're going to live on the run."

"I know. Doesn't make the first time any easier though."

"I grew up with it, so it was never really a problem for me. It's necessity. I am in no way judging you but it just shows how different classes can tolerate different things."

"For example?" she prompted.

"Papa, I'm tired." Roland sighed before she could learn more about the people that had always been so alien to her. Robin knelt down.

"Do you want to ride in the cart?" The boy shook his head.

"Don't like the cart. Too bumpy." He tried to whisper, "Can I ride with Gina?" but he hadn't quite mastered it so she heard every word.

"Yes." Regina chipped in before Robin could say anything. "I'll hold him tight, he'll be quite safe."

He looked unsure, but as he couldn't carry him all the way he agreed. He lifted him up, and Regina shifted back to make room for him on the saddle.

"Hold onto the pommel - there - and you'll be all right. Ok?" He nodded. She slipped a protective arm across his chest, making sure he was secure against her.

"Are we ready to move on?" The men gave a hearty shout of agreement and they pushed on, only stopping to lunch on a slice of bread as they couldn't find a space big enough to build a fire. They travelled until mid-afternoon, when Robin called a halt.

"Here will be as good as any." As the men unpacked and set up, Robin called Regina over. She swung down then carefully lifted Roland down, setting him on the ground before letting go.

"Ready for your first archery lesson?"

"Are you sure you don't have anything else to do?"

"My men have everything sorted. Roland, you go help Friar Tuck." He led her a little way into the forest and, taking out a piece of chalk, drew some rings on a tree.

"I'd keep your gloves on if I were you. Hold the bow in your left hand, like this...and the arrow notches on like that..." He stood behind her; Regina had to suppress a shiver as he put his hands on her shoulder and back, adjusting her posture. What was wrong with her?! "Now, aim a little higher than the ring...that's it...and let it fly." Regina concentrated on the centre of the ring and released the arrow. It just hit the outer ring.

"Don't be discouraged. Archery takes practice. Take it from me, hardly anyone even hits it first go. Some people never hit it at all. And I'll let you into a secret: it's mainly the upper classes." She laughed a bit at that, trying to imagine some of the lords she'd met at balls holding a bow and arrow.

After she'd hit the outer ring a few times, something that had been bothering her for a few hours now came to the surface.

"Robin, what were you and Richard talking about before breakfast? I don't think he trusts me."

"Richard is the newest member of our band, apart from you..."

"I'd hardly say I was a member of your band..."

"You're travelling with us, under our protection, so I consider you a temporary member. Anyway, Richard's not quite as accepting yet as we would want. But I think it's just a class prejudice. - Just lift your aim slightly, the arrow falls as it flies so you want to aim up - Anyone seeing you for the first time would see instantly that you're a lady, not just by the quality of your clothes but how you carry yourself, so you...well, stick out a bit amongst us commoners."

They practised for hours until Much came to announce dinner. Regina was relieved; her arms were aching from first keeping Roland seated and safe and now holding the bow up and pulling the string back. Not to mention her body betraying her whenever he touched her, the tingles down her spine so different, but as beautiful as the feelings she remembered from Daniel's touch.

"We'll practice more tomorrow. Look, you're not a bad archer. You have a naturally good eye and posture, so don't feel you've done badly." Regina nodded.

The next week or two went much the same. The men came to trust and like Regina, and Roland adored her. Richard was still slightly cold but was no longer completely ignoring her. Her archery improved; while she never hit the bullseye she was consistently getting the next ring. She and Robin grew to be close friends, though she still didn't tell him her past and he never brought it up. He was chivalrous almost to a fault, never overstepping the boundary between a friendly and an intimate conversation, and she wasn't sure how she felt about it. Her growing attraction to him scared her, but she found she would trust him with her life. And she loved little Roland to bits.

One day, about two weeks into the journey, they were held up by a heavy spell of rain that lasted all day. Robin decided to stay where they were as he didn't want any of them catching cold, especially Roland, so they stayed in their tents and had to make do with the cold meat left over from last night. Robin, Regina and Roland huddled together in theirs, the adults using their body heat to protect Roland who was the most likely one of them to fall ill. They entertained each other with stories, Robin giving her a bit more insight into his past with a little help from Roland.

"Regina, have I told you about the time Roland had a crush?" He had a playful grin on his face as Roland tried to shut up him by squeezing his cheeks together.

"No! Roland, you never!"

"Oh, yes he did. It was about a year ago, he'd just turned four, and we passed through this small village to get a doctor for Much, who'd broken his arm trying to climb a tree. Don't ask. Anyway, the doctor had a daughter about ten years old, very pretty, beautiful blonde hair and stunning green eyes. She took a shine to Roland and he'd start following her around wherever she went."

Roland was now blushing furiously and pummelling his father's chest with his little fists, and it made Regina laugh. She tickled him under the chin as he stuck his lower lip out.

"You should have seen him, it was the cutest thing ever. He looked like a little lovesick puppy."

They giggled over that for a while longer, then Roland suddenly announced that he was cold. A worried look crossed Robin's face as he laid his hand on his son's forehead. Regina had a brainwave and started tugging blankets out from underneath them, leaving one down to keep the damp off. Laying the blankets over her and Robin's heads she let them drape down.

"If we sit on them, it'll make a cocoon and keep the heat in."

Robin looked at her, impressed.

"If I didn't know any better I'd say you'd done this before."

"I was once caught out in the rain while on a long hack. There was a tree nearby, I had a picnic blanket and a cushion, so I sat on the cushion and draped the blanket over my head and Jerry's back."

As Regina had promised, it soon grew pretty warm in their little fort. Roland fell asleep straight after lunch, leaving Regina and Robin to talk in whispers over his head. They were practically sitting on top of one another, the whole of their upper legs touching as Roland lay on top of them.

"You know, Regina, I think this trip has done you good."

"In what way? Apart from finally getting away from my ambitious, heartless mother, of course."

"Well, when I first met you, there was amost no hope in your eyes. Roland was about the only thing that could make you smile, and you'd glance fearfully over your shoulder every five minutes. Don't think I didn't notice. You weren't exactly subtle about it."

"I'm sorry if you thought I was bored of you."

"No, don't be. I knew why you were jumpy, but my men didn't and Richard especially was suspicious of you at the start, as you know. I'm afraid I told Roland you were running away from something, so that's why he wasn't offended."

Regina started to say something but he held up his hand to quieten her.

"You know what made me really sad? Physically you look no older than twenty, but your eyes betrayed the suffering of a much older woman."

Regina looked down. She thought she'd been so careful with her expression so as to not give anything away, but he'd seen right through her. It both scared and thrilled her; she wasn't sure which was prevalent.

"Now, however, your eyes are sparkling with hope and life, and you're much more relaxed around me, around all of us. It suits you, if I'm allowed to say that."

She wasn't sure how or when it happened but she suddenly found herself closing the gap and pressing her lips to his. He let out a small sound of surpise against her mouth, then kissed her back gently. His hand moved from on top of Roland's head, about to cup her cheek then he thought better of it and slipped his arm round her shoulders, holding her tenderly but not too close. The smell of forest filled her nose, mingled with sweat and something that was uniquely him.

They broke apart when the sound of Roland clapping his hands in glee brought them abruptly out of their little world. Regina blushed as Robin let go of her, the biggest grin on the boy's face she'd ever seen.

"I wanna kiss too!"

"Roland..." The embarrassed smile in Robin's voice belied the warning note.

"Please?"

"All right, there you go." She planted a kiss on his nose, making him giggle.

"Why is your face red?"

"It's getting quite warm in here. Shall we..."

"You're blushing."

"Roland, come on. Give Regina a break."

"Why?"

"You know what? I think the rain's stopped," he announced in an obvious bid to change the subject. Regina noticed with some small relief that he was as embarrassed as she was. He untucked the blankets and stuck his head out of the tent, and sure enough, the constant patter of rain had stopped. All that was left was the dripping of water from the leaves. The air felt clean and refreshed, cooling Regina's burning cheeks.

They decided to stay there for another night as there was no point starting anywhere now, and throughout the rest of the afternoon Regina would catch him looking at her. Not just their eyes happening to meet across the clearing, but she would glance at him every few minutes and he would always have his gaze trained on her face. Lying in bed that night, with Roland curled into her as usual, she wondered if any of the men had suspected anything. Roland had been wearing his father's smirk all day, and the little scamp had probably told them all, but they had still acted completely naturally.

She couldn't stop her mind wandering back and running through the kiss. Just the memory made her lips tingle. Tilting her head, she looked over at Robin who still insisted on sleeping under the stars. The outline of his face in the moonlight fascinated her. She'd been denying this for weeks now but she had to finally admit, he was pretty handsome. Her eyes followed the contours of his profile, subconsciously committing them to memory, not realising she was staring until his eyes flicked open, meeting hers instantly. His mouth curled up into a smile; she felt herself blush again and turned her head away, feigning sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this might seem a bit fast-moving, but if I'm brutally honest I have no idea how to make a two-week-long ride through the forest varied and interesting... plus they knew each other in SB for only a few days before their first kiss so in comparison this is ages :P


	3. Chapter 3

Over the next few days, Regina would find herself staring at him as he led them through the forest. Sometimes she'd catch him watching her, usually when Roland was being his adorable little self and clambering all over her lap. They spoke just as much as they had before, but a certain dynamic had changed. He often touched her for almost no reason at all - a brush of the fingers as he handed her something, a hand on her back as he approached her from behind or sat down next to her. Every moment of contact, however fleeting, sent a barely-suppressed shiver through her and she lay awake at night, beating herself up for giving in to his looks (for he was very good-looking, she had to finally let herself admit it), his prowess with a bow and in leading a team, his love for his son. The sudden showers at night had led to him joining her and Roland in the tent, and it was a lot cosier. So much so that the lack of sufficient blankets wasn't an issue. They'd alternate with telling Roland stories, Regina with her fairytales and Robin with his anecdotes. Whether any of them were true she had yet to find out but they made for very entertaining stories as they lay with Roland between them.

***

During breakfast a few days after that rainstorm, Robin drew close to her and spoke low.

"Regina, we're passing near the road now and there might be some carriages we can help the poor with. Would you be able to look after Roland for me?"

"Of course."

"And there might be the need for a couple of surprise shots so I wondered if you could be just out of sight, on standby in case anything happens?"

"Are you sure? I've never even hit the bullseye."

"You've almost hit it enough times in a row for me to know you could hit something with relative accuracy. The bullseye's tiny, anyway, and can I remind you that you have never missed the target." He was slightly scolding her for her insecurities with the last statement, she could tell.

"All right then, I'll do it. And Roland will be quite safe with me."

"Roland's always safe with you. Possibly more safe than he is with me."

"Robin, don't say that. You've done an excellent job with him."

"It's just that, whenever we'd do one of these pillages, he'd either be left on his own or we'd be one man down. I can't carry him into the fray with me and the poor depend on these being successful."

"It must be difficult."

"It is. Since his mother died in childbed, he's all I have. I can't lose him."

Regina was silent at this unexpected insight into the outlaw's past. A common cause of death, but none the less upsetting for its frequency. She laid her hand on his, trying to comfort him. He squeezed her fingers momentarily before letting go, the touch all too brief for Regina whose lips still tingled with the memory of the kiss they'd shared.

Around lunchtime, Robin suddenly stopped and put his ear to the ground.

"Right, there's a carriage coming. Places!" Everyone ran to a clearly pre-set, well-rehearsed spot around the path, and Regina found a bush with enough of a gap to shoot through. Roland hid behind her skirts. When Robin saw where she'd placed herself, he gave her an approving nod from his spot across the road and aimed his bow.

At his nod, everyone fired a warning arrow at the carriage. But Regina froze, suddenly petrified. She collapsed to the ground, leaning against the trunk of the bush, her legs unable to hold her up. She could hear everything in slow motion: the shouts of the Merry Men, the snorting of the frightened horses and the thuds of warning arrows hitting the carriage.

It seemed to last forever, when in reality it was only a few minutes. When it was over, Roland, who'd been holding his cry in ever since she collapsed, knelt beside her and called her name.

"Gina! Gina!" Over and over again. She wanted to reach out and pull him into her, but her limbs felt like lead. She couldn't move if her life depended on it.

She heard silence, then a voice, then Robin fell to his knees beside her, the sack of loot momentarily forgotten. She felt his strong arms around her, lifting her, supporting her, and warmth flooding through her. She started to regain some control of her limbs and her tongue unstuck itself from the roof of her mouth as he cradled her head.

"Regina, speak to me. What happened?"

"Robin, I am so sorry. That carriage... It was my fiancé's." It took a second for him to figure out.

"Wait, the King? You're engaged to the King, of all people?" She nodded slowly, unable to look him in the face though they were only inches apart.

"Please tell me he didn't see you."

"I don't think he did. I just saw the outside of the carriage, and of course recognised the crest. I think my mother was in there with him."

"Pardon my bluntness, but the harsh-faced lady?"

"That's the one."

"You don't look at all alike."

"People used to say the exact opposite but I never believed it." The men had now gathered around and she felt awkward, lying in his arms in such an intimate way in public. The tent was one thing, the forest floor was another entirely. She wriggled out of his grasp, embarrassed.

"I think I'm all right now, thank you." He helped her up, and Roland hugged her as high as he could reach, which wasn't far.

"Can we talk about this later?" she whispered as they passed each other. He nodded, slinging his bow across his shoulder and picking up the sack. Regina put her arms round the distraught boy, trying to reassure him that she wasn't going to die on him.

They lit a fire and had a celebratory lunch, but both Robin and Regina were quiet. She because she had been one turn of the head away from being caught and arrested (and probably forced to the marriage bed, which would be enough to sombre anyone's mood) he because... she had no idea why he was so quiet. Her romantic heart entertained the idea that he was either jealous, or genuinely worried for her safety; her brain belied the last one, saying of course he'd be worried if she got caught because then he would be too, and he'd committed far more crimes than she had.

The rest of the day was smooth: they found a small village and distributed the stolen goods. The villagers clearly knew Robin by name as he was greeted like a war hero, and children clung to his legs. She stayed in the woods, hidden by the trees, as he didn't want her reputation to be tainted. Also, after the near escape earlier, they were both on the watch for anyone who might possibly recognise her, from when they announced the King's engagement, and turn her in.

***

Regina woke the next morning feeling tired and grumpy after a broken night's sleep, and still thoroughly annoyed at herself for failing the men when they needed her. Roland had been fidgety, and her nightmare of the stable had returned, but instead of Daniel's dark hair and eyes and smooth face, it was sandy blonde hair on the head she cradled in her lap, and the face she kissed was rough to the touch. She'd woken about five times during the night, and each time had taken an hour or two to drop off again. It disconcerted her to say the least, and as a result she wasn't a very pleasant person that day. She knew it, and tried to keep away from everyone as much as possible because it wasn't their fault she was in a bad mood. She even shunned Roland, accidentally snapping at him when he pestered her for a ride on Jerry when he wasn't in the least tired. She shouldn't have let that bother her, but it was the fear speaking, the fear of falling in love with someone she'd be leaving relatively soon, whose son she already felt like a mother to. Also, just the knowledge that she'd been within a few metres of her own mother made the anger bubble up in her throat again.

After she'd snapped at Roland, he'd scampered back to his father and she'd fallen back from the others slightly to clear her head and calm herself down. Jerry trotted slowly, the regular rise and fall helping her relax and soon she was seeing less red and more green. She still kept apart from them until they stopped to eat, just in case, as she wasn't sure Roland would have forgiven her yet.

When she did join them, they were already tucking in to the cold meat from yesterday. Robin shifted over for her like the gentleman he was, but the rest ignored her. She took her lunch and went to sit apart from them until they were ready to set off, ashamed of herself though she wasn't quite sure what she'd done that was so bad it merited being outcast.

She hadn't been sitting there for very long when she heard a twig snap behind the tree she was sitting against.

"Who is it?" she called half-heartedly. She really wasn't in the mood for talking right now, but her expression softened when Roland stuck his head round the trunk, his hands hidden under his cloak.

"Oh, hello, Roland. I'm sorry I snapped at you earlier."

"It's ok. I picked these for you. I thought you needed cheering up and Papa says ladies always like flowers." He held a bunch of wildflowers out in both hands, his little face filled with hope. While she wondered if Robin had asked him to give them to her she could never resist those dimples. She reached out and took them, bringing them to her nose and letting their sweet scent overwhelm her.

"Thank you, dear, they're really lovely." She'd always been fond of natural flowers, much preferred them to the pristine roses grown in her mother's greenhouses. She was surprised when he knelt down and kissed her on the cheek.

"I'm sorry I upset you."

"Oh, Roland, you didn't. I was just in a grumpy mood." She kissed his cheek in return, making him blush red as a cherry which made her smile for the first time all day. He snuggled down, head in her lap, as she tucked the flowers into her belt.

"Do you like Papa?" he asked, after a few minutes just lying there.

"In what way?" she asked automatically before she could stop herself, the question taking her by surprise.

"There's two ways of liking someone?" He sat up and cocked his head to the side, puzzled by this concept. Regina mentally slapped herself. How was she going to explain this?

"Well... you can like someone like your Papa likes Much, and Will, and Friar Tuck, and Richard, you know the word friends?" Roland nodded, "...and you can also like someone like a mama likes a papa." She said the last quietly, not quite sure if he would be all right with her bringing up the touchy subject of mothers. To her relief, he didn't burst into tears. He didn't seem like the kind of boy who burst into tears on a whim, anyway.

"Do you like Papa like a mama?"

This was getting increasingly awkward by the minute. What was she supposed to say? Yes, I love your Papa but we can never be together because I am engaged to someone else and anyway I hadn't planned on falling in love again so when I ran away this wasn't an issue? Definitely not. But then she couldn't lie and say she saw him solely as a friend, because he had become so much more than that in the few weeks she'd known him. Mentor, teacher, protector (though he had admitted himself that she didn't need one), even a form of saviour. Plus she suspected Roland had a knack for telling when someone was lying to him.

She was saved answering by the man himself coming upon their little hideout.

"There you are, Roland, I wondered where you'd gone."

"So... you didn't tell him to give me these?" She gestured to the flowers in her belt. Robin looked surprised.

"No. I didn't even know he was picking them."

It took a couple of seconds for her to get over the shock that a four-year-old had more chivalry than the very King himself.

But then he was raised by a man who steals from the rich to give to the poor, she remembered.

***

The rest of the day passed quietly, the men still mostly ignoring her. They only started talking to her again that evening when Roland ran at her and she swung him into the air before settling him on her hip, touching her nose to his as she tucked him in. From the 180 degree change from hostile to friendly, she deduced that if she wanted to stay in their favour, she needed to be nice to Roland. The slightly childish way they had of showing their loyalty to the boy made her laugh at them slightly, but it was still touching.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This and Chapter 5 were originally going to be one long one but I split it up, so this one's quite short.

After that initial sleepless night, the stable dreams occurred less often. They still happened fairly regularly and it hurt more every time she saw Daniel merge into Robin then her mother rip his heart out, but she had no more days where she was horribly grumpy from lack of sleep. Though her courses had started, the cramps were better than they usually were; she'd learnt to be grateful for small mercies. It did afford her an excellent opportunity for teaching Roland how to ride properly though, instead of always being held on, and to practice the skills she was learning from the other men.

Unfortunately for her, Robin guessed immediately what was up when she suddenly stopped riding for long periods of time. The one time he mentioned it, she successfully shut him up with a glare so ferocious he actually looked scared, but she was touched that he was still concerned enough to notice when the cramps got exponentially worse one evening.

"Massages always helped my wife when she had this," he commented as he sat down behind the tent, where she'd crawled to avoid the enquiring looks. She heard the unspoken question and wordlessly nodded, in too much pain to summon the energy to speak. They were out of sight of the camp so she didn't feel too worried about shifting to let him sit behind her, leaning against his chest as he released the tension in her shoulders. She was pretty tired already from an unusually difficult stretch of forest, and Robin's strong fingers and the warmth radiating from his body relaxed her just enough. The last thing she remembered before succumbing to sleep was being laid down and a tender kiss pressed to her forehead.

***

The next morning happened to be particularly sunny, and Regina woke before anyone else was up, even Robin who was usually awake first. She looked at him sleeping on the other side of Roland, feeling a pang of guilt as she realised his early risings must be from sleeping on the hard forest floor and getting soaked by the dew for the best part of a month. He'd definitely got up later since the showers drove him back to the tent.

Picking up the bow and quiver he had given her she made her way over to one of the wide trees just outside the camp and carefully drew the concentric rings on it. The dawn chorus seemed to hold its breath as she drew the arrow back, taking aim and letting go. It just missed the bullseye.

Not to be deterred, she drew another back, and another. Each one gradually forming a ring right around the bullseye, but never quite hitting it.

"Focus on your actions, not the target." Regina almost jumped out of her skin, caught completely off guard. She whipped round to face the owner of the voice, her plait coming round behind her and hitting her right in the face. Disgruntled, she flicked it back over her shoulder.

"What are you laughing at?"

"I'm not!" he protested, trying desperately to hold in his mirth. There was a single moment of silence before he ran out of self-control and snorted, making Regina's annoyance melt away and she ended up laughing too. She smacked her palm to her forehead in mock despair as Robin clapped her on the shoulder, laughing with her.

"I wish you could have seen your face when your hair got you right on the nose!"

"I wish you could have seen you trying to hold your laughter in. Funniest sight I've seen in months."

"Come on. Have another go."

She pulled yet another arrow back, focussing this time on everything her body was doing and shutting out everything else. Feet shoulder width apart; body side on; left arm straight out; right hand by her ear... The arrow struck the target dead centre.

"Well. Pardon me for saying this but I was not expecting that. Shot of the day, Regina!" He reached round her; she thought he was going to pull her into a celebratory hug but no, he picked up the end of her plait and booped her nose with it, bringing up her still bubbling laughter.

"What's so funny?" an indignant Roland stood nearby, hands on hips. The defiance radiating from the little hunter was so adorable, especially followed by a massive yawn. Robin swept him up into his arms so he didn't feel too offended.

"We're not laughing at you, Roland, we're laughing with you." Regina ruffled his hair, and eventually he smiled. "Come on, how would you like to steer Jerry?"

His little face lit up like the sun as he nodded furiously. Taking him into her arms, she promised not to go too far.

"You know, I do trust you with him. You don't have to ask just to take him a little way off." The look in his blue eyes disconcerted her. It was the same look he'd had after that rainy afternoon... She knew her self-control wasn't great at the best of times so she simply nodded, smiled and carried Roland over to Jerry who was tethered near their tent. She felt his eyes on her as she heaved the saddle on and coaxed the bit into his mouth, the back of her neck suddenly uncomfortably hot.

"Right, hold your hands out like this..." she tried to thread the reins through his fingers, but he was so tense even her strong hands couldn't prise them open. One sudden movement from Jerry and he would tumble off.

"Relax. You're quite safe. He can sense when you're scared, so you have to be confident. If you're scared, so is he and that's when he goes fast."

"OK." He nodded, mouth set in a grim line of determination. She was now able to open his hands enough to show him how to hold the reins properly.

Like in everything else, he proved himself to be a quick learner and soon he was riding by himself and she could let go of the bridle.

"I'm hungry," he complained as she lifted him down half an hour or so later. Settling him on her hip she led Jerry back to the camp where Robin was watching them.

"Nice work, he's become a great little rider."

"He's a quick learner. Soon he'll be giving me a run for my money," she jested.

"Mm." The sound was non-committal and Regina wasn't sure whether it was even a comment on what she'd said.

"Is breakfast ready yet?"

"Just about." Roland scrambled down and ran towards the campfire, as usual the first one to be served.

She involuntarily clutched her stomach, the niggling pain returned.

"Are you all right?" His face now had concern etched into every feature.

"Yeah, I think so. Thank you for last night, by the way."

"It's my pleasure." He held her gaze for a second before turning and walking over to get food.


	5. Chapter 5

That entire day, Regina found herself conflicted. Her heart wanted to give in to his chivalry, good looks, life of freedom; her head screamed that this was moving far too fast to last for any significant length of time. True, she had made the first move, but she still wasn't entirely sure what had possessed her to kiss him.

Eventually she got so frustrated with herself, going round in circles, she just had to take out her frustration on a tree, knowing she wouldn't get any sleep if she didn't. Pulling the arrow back, she focused hard on the centre, letting the arrow fly straight and true. It hit the bullseye with a satisfying thud, quivering with the impact.

"Well done." She could see him leaning nonchalantly against a tree, arms folded. Not trusting herself to answer him calmly, she notched another arrow. It landed right next to the first one and satisfaction replaced her frustration.

"You are becoming quite the archer." He pushed himself off the tree and came towards her, a strange, unreadable expression on his face.

"Thank you. It's good to finally be able to do something that might actually be useful." His praise of her meant far more than she'd care to admit.

"You said you wanted to talk about what happened, a few days ago? During the raid? I wondered if now would be a good time. Roland's asleep and the men are playing cards."

"I...ok." She took his hand and pulled him over to a fallen log nearby, knowing hers was a long one.

"I...I think I'm ready to trust you with my story and why I'm running away. Please, bear with me, it's kind of complicated." Robin was silent; she took it as encouragement to continue. Taking a deep breath, she launched in.

"I was in love, really in love, with my family's stable boy. He was my only proper childhood friend, and we were so similar. My parents didn't know about it; we kept it a secret, the biggest secret I've ever had in my life. After I saved the princess from a runaway horse, her father proposed and well, my mother accepted on my behalf."

"I'm sorry, the King proposed to you? He's about three times your age!"

"Not quite. He's thirty years older."

"And he's fifty so that makes you...twenty?"

"Almost." She heard him breathe out slowly, trying to come to terms with it. "But you understand how I felt about it. Daniel and I planned to run away together the next night. He gave me this ring to mark our engagement," here she took her locket out of her bodice and letting him hold the ring inside. Her voice was quiet and subdued as she said, "I found out after his death, from his friend in the kitchens, that he'd spent his whole weekly wage on it."

"It's beautiful. Is that him?" He pointed to the picture on the inside of the locket.

"Yes. My mother demanded that I show 'more ladylike accomplishments', and she didn't want to be sketched so I drew him. It's one of the few drawings I did that I'm sort of happy with." Robin took the locket from her to have a closer look.

"It's excellent." It was - life shone out of the man's eyes, there was a gentle smile tugging at the corners of his mouth and the detail on the little clothing seen in the picture was exquisite. His admiration of a, in her opinion, sub-par drawing made her feel embarrassed.

"Anyway, Snow White, you know, the princess I saved, saw us in the stable and got upset. I got her to promise not to tell anyone, but the selfish little...went and told my mother." Tears were starting to choke her voice but she swallowed and carried on. "She - my mother - caught us trying to leave and lured me into a false sense of security that she was actually going to let me marry Daniel, but then..." her voice almost broke completely, "...she ripped his heart out... crushed it to ash. He died in my arms." She was properly crying now, her hand pressed to her face trying to stop the tears. She felt Robin's arm come round her shoulder, pulling her into him. She leaned her head on his shoulder as he held her close, all her walls crumbling as she let out the emotion that she'd bottled up for months. It only occurred to her weeks later that he was never confused about the ripping out hearts detail.

After some ten minutes, she forced herself into some form of composure. She tried to sit up out of embarrassment but Robin kept her against his shoulder. She was glad - it felt so right, being here with him, and it gave her some reassurance that her feelings, developed a while ago into something more than friendship, weren't entirely unrequited. "I'm sorry, I know I seem weak."

"You are not weak. Anyone who isn't affected by what your mother did has a heart of stone. In fact, I don't know many people who'd be able to keep something like that quiet for so long without breaking down to someone."

"I didn't have anyone to break down to except Jerry and horses aren't exactly the best huggers."

She felt rather than heard his chuckle rumble through his chest at her attempt at a joke. "This is why I couldn't trust you at first. I didn't know if you would try and use me for your own gain, like Snow did."

"You trusted me to take you where you wanted to go."

"But I knew I had Jerry, I could make a quick getaway if need be."

"Too right. You've been taught well."

"Daniel," she sighed.

"Do you have a father?"

The question surprised her.

"Yes. He didn't want me to marry the King, but he also didn't know about Daniel. I couldn't tell him I was leaving, and Mother would have been sure to find a note wherever I put it. I probably broke his heart." She started crying again. She'd managed to forget about that detail since she'd joined the Merry Men, but now the realisation of what she'd most likely done to her dear father crashed down on her. Leaving now seemed like a big mistake. Robin held her, not saying anything, just letting her cry.  
"My mother then moved us to the palace and I've been trapped there ever since, having to be the girl-bride-to-be of the king. Both him and Snow are so suffocating, he loves her far more than he does me. I don't even know why he bothered to ask me to marry him, he's quite happy enough with her. Eventually it got so bad, I snapped at Snow for no good reason and my mother got angry, so I made the excuse of needing some fresh air and just ran for it. That's why I haven't got much with me, they thought I was just out for a short ride."

"Ah, I did wonder." There was a short pause, which an owl filled with its distinctive call. "I, too, have had someone I love die in my arms." She was silent, guessing this was about Roland's mother. "My wife, Marian, while she was pregnant with Roland, she fell very ill. We almost never had him, she was so ill. I had to steal a wand from Rumplestiltskin to heal her, and even then she died just after Roland was born."

"Wait, who's Rumplestiltskin?"

"He's the Dark One, the most powerful magician in all the lands. He's also ruthless, I barely escaped with my life. She got to kiss him and name him, but other than that she never knew her child."

Regina took his hand between hers.

"I'm so sorry."

"It's all right. It took me a long time to move on but..."

"But what?"

"Nothing."

"At least you have a child to remember your wife by. Daniel and I never even made it to the altar." She realised after she'd said it just how selfish that sounded but he seemed to understand where she was coming from.

"And I am so grateful that I have him. He looks just like her."

"He also looks a bit like my baby brother. I guess that's why I feel a bit responsible for him." A short pause fell, in which she wiped her eyes again. "She must have been very beautiful."

"She was."

They sat there, hands still clasped, for a good while. Neither spoke; they were sorting out their emotions from the heartache both had had to relive that night. Regina's head was still resting on his shoulder, and his cheek rested on the top of her head. She found that her tears had completely dried up, and the pain of losing Daniel was now a mere numbness whenever she thought of him.

"Here. This is yours." He handed her the ring, completely forgetting about the locket which he still held in the fist Regina's hands were covering.

"Oh. Thank you." She took it and looked at it for a bit before slipping it onto her right hand. He lifted his head, shifting slightly so their bodies were angled towards each other.

"You know, Regina, it doesn't hurt as much now."

"I was just thinking the same," she whispered back. Though she couldn't see his eyes - dark fell quickly in the forest - she felt mesmerised by his gaze. It was like he could see into her soul as he moved closer, her eyes fluttering shut as his lips brushed hers.

Once again, the bubble was burst by Roland but this time it was a scream, followed by a panicked "Papa! Papa!" which quickly turned into a desperate cry for Mama as they rushed over to the tent.

Regina gathered the crying boy into her arms, rocking him gently to and fro. While murmuring repeated nothings into his ear in an attempt to calm him down, she shot an apologetic look over his shoulder at Robin, who simply nodded.

She found Roland's strong little hands impossible to detach from her clothing, even after he'd stopped shaking, so she ended up going to bed a bit earlier than she'd planned. He was still clinging to her when she woke to bright beams of sunlight on her face, his head on her chest to listen to her heartbeat. The first thing she was aware of was the surprising warmth flooding through her and something round her waist. Rubbing the sleep out of her eyes she craned her neck round to see Robin close behind her, arms holding her in a protective but not too firm hug and face buried in her long hair, which had once again fallen out of its plait. It was the most intimate position she'd ever been in, sandwiched between a father and son. She stayed still, not wanting to wake either of them. She had to admit, Robin was quite comfortable.

She felt him stir and looked round at him, a smirk playing on her lips as a tease about being a sleepyhead came to mind. But when his gaze met hers, the look he gave her wiped the smirk right off her face. She was suddenly scared, tangible fear clutching at her insides and making it difficult to breathe. Detaching Roland's hands and struggling out of Robin's arms she took a few steps away from the tent; after the recent incident with the carriage her instincts were still on high alert and she knew that if - Heaven forbid - she were ever caught, her mother would go first for whoever she'd formed a bond with.

"Regina? What's wrong?" She sensed him right behind her, and however much she wanted to turn back into his arms she couldn't, for the sake of his family.

"Don't," she warned as he reached out to touch her elbow, hoping he wouldn't hear the fear in her voice.

"Don't what?"

"Don't get any closer."

"Regina..."

"When will we reach the docks?" she asked, desperate to deter him.

"Tomorrow, maybe the day after." She nodded and stepped away, not looking him in the face because she knew she'd give way to tears. She felt him catch her forearm, firm enough to stop her leaving but not so tight as to hurt her. That small gesture of concern caused a lump to rise in her throat as he turned her towards him and held her shoulders. She couldn't look at him.  
"Regina, please tell me what's wrong. You were fine just now, completely open with me last night. What happened?"

"Robin, I...I can't. This, whatever this is between us, it... can't happen. I'm still engaged. It was never formally broken off, unless he's announced something on finding me missing, which I doubt. Do you know what my mother will do if she finds me? She'll do to you what she did to Daniel because that's what'll hurt me the most, and make me willing to do anything if only to save your life. Roland's already lost his mother, he can't lose a father too."

"Regina." The heartbreak in his voice matched how she felt but she still couldn't look at him.

"I love you." Silence fell. Even the birds stopped chirping. Regina let out an uncontrollable sob. She hadn't meant to say that. Why did those words have to come tumbling out right at this moment? It just made it even harder to let him down. "Don't say it. It's hard enough as it is." He closed his mouth and let go of her shoulders, putting distance between them.

"I'll still help you get to the docks. I don't break promises, especially ones to people in need of help." His voice was now cold, matter-of-fact. And it cut her like a knife.

"Thank you."

She turned away, her heart breaking. She walked automatically until she was just outside the camp, sat down on a rock by the stream and cried her heart out.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of ship terminology used in this chapter so a mini-dictionary for anyone who may need it:
> 
> Bow (pronounced: to bow out of a contest): the front of the ship
> 
> Stern: the back
> 
> Port: left side facing forwards
> 
> Starboard: right side facing forwards
> 
> Foredeck: the foremost part of the deck
> 
> Main deck: the mid-section of the ship
> 
> Poop (deck): the high rear deck, where the wheel is (think Rolly Jodger)
> 
> Bowsprit: long pole jutting out from the bow, helps balance the ship
> 
> Gunnel: the 'wall' running round the side of the deck
> 
> Wash: the water flowing around the boat; the movement of the boat causing waves to fan out behind it
> 
> Small beer: very weak beer, much safer to drink than water right up to beyond Victorian times, even for children
> 
> The cat: Cat o'nine tails, common method of punishment at sea consisting of nine thin leather strips joined together at one end and whipped repeatedly across the offender's back
> 
> Anything else anyone doesn't understand, message me and I'll edit accordingly :)

They reached the docks at lunchtime the next day, much to Regina's relief. Robin had been cold, understandably, but it still hurt; Roland had guessed something was wrong and kept trying to get them to talk to each other. Not that they didn't speak any more, more that their easy banter was gone and Robin was sleeping outside again.

Just before they joined the road full of people Robin gave the men all a meeting time; Regina felt sad that she was no longer included in his ensuring everyone was in a certain place at a certain time.

Before they left, the men all gave her small gifts: a drinking horn, two small lighting flints, a knife, a needle and some reels of tough thread just in case they didn't see her before the ship sailed. She was touched to realise they'd grown to like her as much as she liked and admired them, though they tried to pass it off as being practical-minded she hugged them all anyway.

The dock was a busy place: people everywhere, sailors, traders, beggars, stray children running everywhere, bawdy women in rather revealing dresses that made Regina uncomfortable to look at, a couple of officers striding around in their blue uniforms. She'd never seen so many people in one place and the noise was incredible. A host of ships lined the quayside, all different sizes and in different states of repair. Men hung from the rigging and down the hull, painting, scraping shells, repairing breaches. It was a fascinating scene.

Robin gave her a small pouch and told her to go get some new clothes.

"That habit is looking rather the worse for wear. I'll find passage for you." She nodded and made her way to a simple-looking dressmaker's shop, leaving Jerry tied up outside with her bow and arrow. The woman behind the counter greeted her with a smile.

"Hello, Ma'am, I'm looking for a couple of simple dresses? Just for everyday, nothing fancy." She felt the most awkward she'd ever been. So much for the upper classes being more refined and socially capable, she thought. The woman was very helpful though, and soon she was fitted out with two new premades* of slightly differing browns, a linen shift and a shawl.

*premades: ready made dresses in a tailor's shop. Could usually be altered before buying but weren't made to measure

"There you go, my dear," the woman wrapped the clothing up in a neat package, surprising Regina with her ability at making it as small as possible.

"Thank you, ma'am."

"Can I ask where you're going? Simple curiosity, I've never seen you round here before."

"I don't know yet. Good day." She wasn't going to answer anyone's questions just in case they were either spies for the King or wanted to turn her in for a monetary reward. She couldn't be too careful, glimpsing her mother had reinforced that.

Robin met her outside, a slip of paper in his hand and Roland clinging to his cloak.

"Regina, the only passage I could get today was on a cargo ship, the captain had a spare cabin so it'll just be you and the crew. It leaves in ten minutes, Jerry's already on board. Here's your bow. Please, keep safe?"

"I will."

"You have no idea how men can be when there's a young, pretty girl around with no protection." He took a deep breath. "Here's your ticket. And here's some money to start you off over there. Mention my name at the Black Bear, they'll put you up and help you find... something. They're old family friends of mine, though we haven't spoken in a few years."

"Thank you, Robin. Really, thank you for everything you've done for me." Helping me move on from Daniel. Showing me there is unselfish kindness in this world. Teaching me useful skills so I can actually make some use of my life.

She stashed the money safely away in her little bag, which had the gifts from the men inside.

"Miss, we're about to hoist anchor now, so if you could come with me. Your horse is stabled down below." The captain touched his cap and held out his arm.

"Please, Captain Brown, take good care of her."

"Don't worry, Mr. Locksley, she'll be under my protection. Any man goes against her goes against me. That's mutiny and will be dealt with accordingly."

"Thank you." 

"So, I guess this is goodbye," she started, trying to keep her voice steady and pretending not to have heard the previous muttered exchange.

"Yeah, I guess." She desperately wanted to reach out and hug him one last time, but decorum and her conscience wouldn't allow it.

He held out his hand, palm up. She tentatively put hers into his; he bowed and kissed the back of it, his scruff brushing her fingers as she curtseyed. Such a formal goodbye! After everything they meant to each other only a couple of days before.

"I wish you all the best, Regina. In everything."

"You too."

"Gina, why do you have to go? Don't you like us?"

"I like you very much but I have to leave. There's things - people - here I have to get away from. I'm so sorry, Roland." He hugged her tight as high as he could reach, and she dropped a kiss onto his curls before Robin gently detached him from her skirt.

"Gina has to go now."

"Goodbye, Roland. Be a good boy, ok?" He nodded forlornly.

"Goodbye." Robin only nodded; she could see he was trying to hold the tears back. Bowing her head she turned and slipped her arm through the captain's as he escorted her up the gangplank.

She stood on the poopdeck of the ship, out of the way, as the men hoisted anchor, scanning the crowd for Robin and Roland. He was quite tall and would have lifted the boy up so he could see, so she thought she'd be able to spot them easily, but no such luck. She stayed by the side until the crowd started to disperse in the hope of catching one last glimpse of him, but when the people became tiny dots she gave up, and climbed down the ladder to her assigned cabin near the captain's.

It smelled musky, as only one window opened (and only part-way at that), but there was sufficient light to see by and it seemed clean enough. She laid her clothes on one of the bunks and stood her bow in a corner. She smiled at the irony that he'd bought her all this with money stolen from her own fiancé's carriage.

Stripping off her filthy dress and dumping it in a corner to wash later, she gave herself a quick scrub down using the water in the pitcher on the table. Clearly this cabin was reserved by the captain for any female guests he brought on board, though the smell of seasalt and tar was still predominant over smelling salts and perfume. Picking out the darker dress and the shift she revelled in the simple pleasure of putting clean clothes on and brushing her hair with the comb left on top of the seachest.

Once her hair was tangle free and falling in waves over her shoulders she decided to explore the cabin. There were two bunks on either side; a large sea chest that, on opening, was found to contain a number of ladies' dresses, hats, parasols and petticoats. They were all hues of pink, red, yellow and blue, and while she quite liked the pale blue one the dresses were far too fancy, especially now she was more used to sleeping rough.

Cabin explored, she wrapped the shawl around her shoulders and made her way out on deck, breathing in the brackish air. The sea was calm, but she hadn't found her sea legs yet so had to hold onto the gunnel to get to the foredeck with dignity intact. It was a completely new experience, therefore a novelty to lean over the bow and be fascinated by the wash thrown up by the ship as she sliced through the water.

She didn't know how long she'd been standing there when a commotion behind made her turn. A group of sailors were surrounding something, or someone, she wasn't sure which, and shouting at it. She didn't dare go up and confront them; Robin's warning was fresh in her mind. She was somewhat surprised there had been a mishap this early on in the voyage, they were barely out to sea yet and men were still scrambling along the rigging.

She was about to turn back to watching the green and white waves when two high-ranking officers bodily forced the men apart to reveal a trembling child. The men fell silent in the presence of their superiors.

"Roland?" she gasped, unable to believe her eyes. She ran to him, just reaching him before he collapsed in a dead faint.

"Excuse me, miss, you know this boy?" one of the officers addressed her, touching his hat as a mark of respect.

"Yes, I do, sir."

"Then you won't mind taking full responsibility for him for the duration of this voyage. As you can see, the men have far more important things to worry about, no offence meant."

"Of course, sir."

"Make sure he stays out of the way. And by that I mean below decks," the older of the two instructed in a pompous voice. She curtesyed as well as she could with an unconscious child in her arms and took him back to her cabin, ignoring the whistles from the crew. Laying him down on her bunk and pulling the covers over him she started to bathe his pale forehead with the water left over, wondering how on earth he'd managed to escape Robin and board the ship without anyone noticing.

After a while he began to revive and half-sat up, leaning to the side and looking rather green about the gills.

"I think I'm going to be sick." She quickly grabbed the bucket sitting under the bunk and held it under him just as he threw up. She put an arm round his shoulders, the other holding the bucket as he emptied his stomach. He lay back, looking really very ill. Regina wiped his face clean, curiosity getting the better of her.

"Roland, why are you on the ship? How did you get away from your father?"

"I forgot to give you this," he whispered, holding out his hand. On the palm lay a pretty, rough little stone of an unusual pink and white colour. Tears pricked the back of her eyes as she kissed his pallid forehead, rewarded with a wan smile before he fell asleep, utterly exhausted.

It was a long night for Regina, who stayed awake to nurse him. Alternately bathing his forehead and emptying the bucket through the window she stroked his hair back and talked to him, held him close when he cried with the pain in his sides. Her mind was constantly on Robin - where was he? Did he know where Roland was right now? In the morning she was brought some food and small beer; she had to use the penknife to break up the biscuits, which were rock solid. He refused point-blank to eat the salted meat.

While he slept, she thought hard about what to do. Clearly Robin needed to know his son was safe but she had no idea how to let him know, and the voyage was a month long. Eventually she decided to write him a letter, for even if they didn't pass a ship travelling the opposite way she could send it when they got to the other end. The thought of what the poor man must be going through haunted her, knowing she couldn't do anything or even if she'd be able to reunite them.

Rummaging around in her bag for the now crumpled paper and pencil she'd thought to bring when she ran away, she scribbled a note that would hopefully dispel his fears, dripping some wax from the candle lamp to seal it. For want of a pocket she tucked it inside her bodice so she would always have it ready.

Roland's sickness lasted for a good week and a half. She realised near the start that fresh air would be the best remedy instead of being cooped up in a smelly cabin all the time, but she didn't want to provoke the captain or the crew so kept quiet and tried to act the mother he needed. Eventually it got so bad that she got very worried, not to mention tired, and throwing all caution to the wind she strode up to the captain's door and knocked decisively. He was standing over his desk, studying something with great concentration but he straightened when she entered.

"Come in! Oh, hello, miss. What can I do for you?"

"You know the little boy who was found on the ship? He's very seasick and I think some fresh air would do him some good. However, one of your officers told me to keep him below decks so I was wondering if you could overrule that in the interests of hygiene."

"I don't know, miss. A ship's a busy and dangerous place, I wouldn't want my crew mutinying on the grounds I didn't look after a lady."

"Look, would you rather have your next guests complaining of the smell? I think it's in everyone's best interests to let him out, if only for a while each day. You don't want sickness on your ship, no matter how contagious it may or may not be."

A strange look came into the captain's eyes and he advanced towards her. She kept her head up, trying to defy him with her confidence but he was making her feel extremely uncomfortable. He laid the back of his hand against her cheek, stroking under her jaw and running it through her hair (which she'd left half down).

"As long as you keep out of the way of the crew and go straight back down below if an officer tells you to, you may have free reign on deck," he murmured into her ear.

"Thank you, captain." She curteseyed and left hastily, cheeks burning.

She pushed the incident to the back of her mind in order to concentrate fully on Roland. Wrapping him up in his cloak and a spare blanket she found underneath the gowns, she carried him upstairs clutching the bucket. Taking him up to the foredeck, where she was pretty sure of being out of the way, she asked the lookout if she could sit a while. The lad - for he looked no older than fifteen - agreed; Regina sat Roland next to her, leaning against the base of the bowsprit with her arm round him. The poor boy was still clutching the bucket.

"So, what's your name then?" she asked the lookout lad, who was only too happy to talk.

"John, miss. Yourself?"

"Re...becca. Mills." She suddenly knew detection would be a lot more difficult if she changed her name. Rebecca was also simpler than Regina, fitted her current situation better. She wasn't sure where she'd come up with Mills but she had to stick with it now.

"And this is Roland." Her brain was working overtime trying to come up with a plausible story that would answer for her surprise at seeing him on board while keeping her reputation intact. "I'm afraid he's quite seasick so he may not be inclined to talk."

"Fair enough. I was the same my first voyage. That was when I was thirteen: now I can climb the rigging faster than any man on this crew."

"All the way up there?" Regina asked, craning her neck upwards. The crow's nest seemed a hundred feet in the air.

"Yup. You get used to it." He sighed heavily and lay back along the bowsprit, his head near hers and feet dangling over the bow into open space. "So what brings such a pretty lady to this neck of the woods? Come on, I promise not to tell anyone."

She tried not to grimace at the mention of the woods.

"I could hardly be called a lady. And I'm sorry, but too many people have betrayed my trust for me to dole it out that easily."

He merely shrugged. "At least you acknowledged it, not many ladies do. Too busy looking down their noses at us seafolk. You're decent."

From the hardy, strapping lad she guessed that was a big compliment so took it as such, bowing her head in acknowledgement. He suddenly sat up and pointed, lowering his voice.

"You see that lieutenant?" He was pointing at the officer who'd told her to stay down below. "That's Lieutenant Gilmartin. He's a right nasty one, you should stay out of his way as much as you can. He's been known to..."

"SMITH!" Lt. Gilmartin bellowed. "Do your job or it's the cat for you!"

"Yes sir!" John yelled back sharply and turned back to face the wide expanse of sea, still straddling the bowsprit. He spoke out of the side of his mouth.

"He's been known to prey on pretty young girls like you. If you look unattached, he thinks you're fair game so be on your guard. I'd move that ring to your wedding finger if I were you."

Regina looked down at her hands - Daniel's ring gleamed brightly in the afternoon sun. It was hard to believe such a beautiful thing could hold so many painful memories. She swallowed as she twisted it round her finger, loosening the gold before swapping it to her left hand. It was a strange feeling - she wasn't sure if she liked it or not.

She shook her head briefly, trying to shake the images from her mind as she gave Roland a quick drink from what she'd saved of her rations.

"How are you feeling?"

"A bit better, thank you."

"Try and sleep for a bit. I'll wake you up when food comes." The boy laid his head in her lap and closed his eyes, thumb back in his mouth as he dropped off. Regina and John sat in silence, him watching the horizon and her trying again to think of the story she would tell. It was sure to come up in conversation at some point and she'd rather get it straight now than have to think on her feet.

The rest of the afternoon passed without event, as did the next few days. Roland recovered with the fresh air and was soon waddling about the deck, clinging onto anything to try and find his sea legs. Regina was now pretty used to the motion of the ship and would often find herself running after him so he didn't get under anyone's feet.

John took a liking to Roland, and he responded well as the cabin boy started to teach him some knots with a length of rope.

"It makes the hours seem shorter," he told Regina when she asked if he would get told off for not concentrating. "You get good at observing the whole horizon in one glance."

Sometimes the crew would flirt with her, but she'd simply move her left hand in such a way as to set the ring shining in the sun and they soon left her well alone. Apart from one, who'd sidle up to her while Roland was playing with John and slip his arm round her waist. No matter how many times she pushed him away, he just kept coming and she wasn't going to ask for someone to stop him because she'd be seen as weak. And that wasn't good because it meant she could be manipulated. The captain might have promised Robin he would take care of her but she didn't trust him, not after that incident in his cabin a few days ago. She'd seen him once while the sailor was accosting her, watching them and doing nothing to put a halt to it. The night after that had happened she'd realised she only had her own wits to survive this journey with everything intact.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Evil plan activated...I just really liked the idea of Roland having to rely on Regina, and Regina having to learn how to be a mother and surviving on her own, and turning out to be quite good at it. I don't know if she sees Roland as her own yet though.


	7. Chapter 7

Just over two weeks since they'd left port, everyone was woken by a loud bell and shouting.

"All hands on deck!"

Regina sat up in bed. The ship was definitely rolling more, and the wind whistled past the window that she'd left open for ventilation. Swinging her feet out of the bunk she wrestled with the casement, finally managing to slam it shut against the elements.

"Gina!"

"It's all right, Roland. There's a storm coming, but you'll be quite safe." He whimpered and buried his head in her chest.

The door flew open then and John's silhouette could be seen in the flickering lamplight.

"Miss, captain's orders you're to stay here with your son."

"Is everything all right?" she yelled above the wind.

"It's a squall, but should be over by morning!" He wrenched the door shut and ran off, leaving Regina to the prospect of yet another sleepless night.

It wasn't over by morning. It wasn't over by the next night. Rations didn't come, which in a way was a blessing because once they'd both emptied their stomachs they could lie in bed and keep each other warm without having to constantly reach for the bucket. Her blankets were piled on top of his bunk, and she told him stories to get him to sleep. But they were both very thirsty and hungry by the time John finally came to the door the next morning with half a tankard of small beer.

"I'm afraid that's it - we took on a lot of water and one of the beer barrels is leaking."

"What about food?"

"There's only biscuits, I'm afraid," he drew a couple of the hard tack biscuits out of his pocket, "meat's reserved for sailors while the storm lasts. The boy won't need much and you're not doing anything, they said when I tried to reason with them. I'm sorry."

"It's all right. We'll survive, won't we, Roland?" He didn't look up - he was terrified out of his wits.

"SMITH!"

"I've got to go. I'll bring more food when our rations are doled out."

"Good luck."

"We're going to need it. Three men on rotation at the bilge pump right now means we're three men down on deck. We'll need all the luck we can get." And with that, he ran off, not quite shutting the door in his haste. Regina had to fling herself across the room and wrestle it shut before it did damage to her bow, which was standing behind it.

"It's ok, Roland," she soothed as she curled up with him again.

"Are we going to sink?"

"No, we are not going to sink. The sailors know what they're doing and they will get us out of this." She was saying it to convince herself as well as him. "We will be absolutely fine."

"Gina?"

"Yes, dear?"

"Do you have my stone?"

"It's in my bag, why?"

"It's meant to be good luck. Papa thought I should give it to you for your journey."

"And you think it will help the storm pass?"

She felt him nod against her shoulder and sighed as she knew he wouldn't leave her alone until she'd fetched it.

Once she'd negotiated the rolling of the ship, found her bag and rummaged for the stone without spilling anything, she was feeling a bit ill again.

"If we both hold it and close our eyes tight it will bring us good luck. I hope." She smiled at his attempt to be optimistic, for she knew he was hating the entire trip. He was used to the forest, had grown up in the open air, and now he had to be cooped up for days in a small cabin that seemed to roll any which way it chose.

Not really believing him, she still wrapped her hands around his little ones and shut her eyes. She opened them slightly when her eyes started to sting a little, and Roland was lying there, hands still clasped and eyes shut tight with concentration. His faith in this stone was adorable, and made her remember herself at five years old. Maybe not believing in lucky stones, but definitely believing in hope and happiness. It made her want it to work for his sake so she shut her eyes again, repeating in her head, 'The storm will pass. The storm will pass. The storm will pass' over and over again.

They both fell asleep after a while, and when they woke the wind was no longer whistling past the window and the ship wasn't rolling quite so much. The sun was shining, albeit through a gap in the clouds, and little Roland's cheeks dimpled fully for the first time in weeks.

"It's working! Look, Gina!"

"So it is," she replied, smiling. Maybe now they could go out on deck, get some fresh air and stretch their legs. But first, she realised, they had to change and wash their clothes. Roland's only set were slightly damp from the rain coming in the window, and she regretted not getting another shift when she'd had a chance.

"Can we go out?"

"Not yet, we need to dry your clothes first. We don't want you getting a cold now, do we?" She set about hanging the clothes up, or rather, draping them from any surface she could find. She took the lamp down from its hook and hung Roland's cloak in its place; the rest of the roof was smooth so trousers and shirt had to make do with lying on the sea chest. Her dresses - mercifully - were both dry, though one of them could do with a wash she didn't think the crew would be very impressed with such an unimportant request as one for washing water. She'd lived in one dress for over a month, a few more days wouldn't hurt. She put on the clean one, making a mental note to scrub and mend her habit over the next few days as she still hadn't had the chance to do that what with Roland's sudden appearance on board.

She opened the window and lifted him up so he could breathe some fresh air. It was brackish, but a whole lot better than the air in the cabin. The sea was still slightly lumpy, and shouts could be heard from the men above, but nothing seemed amiss.

The wind picked up again at about lunchtime, though it wasn't as bad as before. John came running in again with a tankard of beer and their biscuits, muttering about "too much to do, not enough men, too much water in this God-forsaken sea".

"Look, John, I can help. Just tell me what to do and I'll learn."

"The bilge could do with another pair of hands. I'll take you there now but he's got to stay here."

"I don't want to leave him alone. He'll be out of the way, I promise."

"Fine. We can't waste any more time, we're taking a lot of water!" Regina took Roland's hand, grabbed the lantern and the three of them ran down flights of stairs and between hammocks until they were in the belly of the ship. Two men were there, working by one lantern swinging on a hook in the wall.

"Just copy them. It's easy to do, but hard work." He ran off again, and the two sailors looked at her askance, and she recognised the one who hadn't left her alone.

"Roland, stay here, ok?" She set him on the staircase so his feet weren't in the water starting to seep through the floorboards.

"Basically just keep pumping until we say switch," the other one said. The weariness in his voice was apparent. She set to work, and the others collapsed on the other side of the little room to gulp down their meagre rations. Her arms were aching well before they called the switch but she pushed on through.

"You're a good worker, I have to say," the shorter one of the two commented hours later, when they finally managed to make some headway on the water level. "I wouldn't mind having you on my crew, despite women being terrible bad luck aboard ship." She didn't have the energy to thank him, even sarcastically for being open about his beliefs about women.

Yet more hours later and the bosun came down to tell them the storm was over. He gave them all a ration, including a sailor's portion for Regina and a biscuit for Roland. There was still some water in the bottom, so she kept pumping until she'd gotten out as much as she could.

"We've tarred the spare sail and it's over the breach. It should hold until we get to port."

"She has been amazing," she could hear the men saying as she collapsed, finally, next to Roland, who snuggled up to her. "She never complained, never stopped. She'd be an asset to the crew."

"She's a woman. Women are bad luck, I don't know what the captain was thinking bringing her aboard. Especially with a son."

"He's been great too, at keeping out of the way. Honestly, she should be allowed to help on deck." It was mainly the shorter one who was saying all this; the one who had previously chased her was just staring at her over the rim of his mug but she couldn't have cared less right now.

"Speak to the captain about it. I'm in no position to appoint members of the crew." And with that, the bosun departed.

"Come on, miss. Let's get you up on deck." She forced herself onto her feet, ready to drop again but he took her arm to steady her.

Upstairs, the sun was shining but the atmosphere was far from jubilant. Some men were still running about, but most were slumped on the floor with their celebratory gin. She shrugged off the sailors - who'd eventually introduced themselves as Douglas and Sam (who was still running his hands along her waist, no doubt using her tiredness as an excuse) - and lifted Roland onto the bench that ran around the gunnels, downing her share in one. She could see Douglas talking to the captain and first mate by the stairs up to the poop.

Captain Brown summoned her over.

"Douglas here says you'd be an asset to the crew." His voice sounded intrigued, amused and slightly disbelieving.

"I don't know about that, but I..."

"SHIP OFF THE PORT BOW!"

He strode to the side, pulling out his telescope. "Oh no."

"What is it?" Regina asked, curiosity getting the better of her. He turned to face his mate.

"Pirates."


	8. Chapter 8

Regina's heart sank into her stomach as officers gave orders and men scrambled to fulfil them. Her father's tenants had sometimes signed up for the navy and she'd heard so many stories of pirates from the few stragglers who survived.

Her first thought was Roland. He was the most vulnerable person on this ship, and Robin would never forgive her if she didn't bring his son back alive, especially considering he had no idea where Roland was right now. But what to do? If she left him below he was trapped. Up here, the pirates would be more likely to see him but then so would she, and she could protect him. But he would also be at risk of being either physically, or worse, emotionally affected by the fighting. The boy had been through enough as it was. Her bow and arrows still stood in the corner of the cabin; maybe she could hide him behind her and fire from the foredeck.

She rushed down and grabbed her weapons before anything else, also tying her bag around her waist underneath her dress so she had it just in case, but so it wasn't obviously visible. She pulled her hair up into a bun, made sure the letter was still safe inside her bodice and went back up.

"Captain, I can shoot if you'll let me. You'll need everyone you can get."

"I know that." He seemed to be quick-firing the pros and cons through his head before nodding, only a minute later. "Fine. But stay out of the way."

She was glad that he was too preoccupied with the impending doom to be concerned with pursuing her.

"Mrs Mills!" She did a double-take as she momentarily forgot her alias. John was running up to her with a scabbard and sword.

"You'll need this. I don't know how good you are at hand-to-hand combat but it'll be useful anyway. Good luck."

"You too, John. Thank you." She spontaneously, briefly, hugged him before bringing Roland up to the foredeck. She stood with him in silence as the other ship approached. When it drew near she crouched down and took him by the shoulders, making sure he knew she was being serious now.

"Roland, I need you to stay behind me, whatever happens. Don't look at the deck. Focus on me, I will keep you safe. And if you're caught, you must say I'm your Mama, all right? Otherwise they may keep us apart. Do you understand?"

"Yes...mama."

"Good boy." She hugged him, kissed him on the forehead and stood up. "Now, hold on to me and stay hidden!"

She nocked an arrow just as grappling hooks came flying through the air, catching in the rigging. Cannons went off simultaneously from both sides as pirates flew across the gap, firing pistols at an alarming rate. Regina shot two down before they even reached the deck but swiftly realised she'd have to save her ammunition for as long as she could as the bodies fell into the waters with her arrows in their chests.

So she mainly saved them for the pirates already on deck, and managed to stay undetected behind the thick foremast for quite a while. Robin was clearly a skilled bow maker as not a single arrow missed its mark. Yet another cause to love him.

But there was no time to think of him as a pirate found his way to the steps up. She shot him swiftly but in doing so, gave away her position and more pirates started coming her way. It was too hectic for her to feel the emotional force of killing someone for the first time. Roland had his head buried against the back of her dress, and she was glad for it meant he couldn't see the gruesome fighting going on on deck. Blood was everywhere, dead bodies lay where they'd fallen and men stepped over them without a glance.

Though the sailors were fighting for their lives, they were all tired out from working through the storm and the pirates soon had the upper hand. Regina had the element of surprise on her side but she was running out of arrows and they just kept on coming.

Nocking her final arrow, she scanned the deck for anyone who was in especially dire straights. Stomach dropped again as she saw John trapped in the corner; she let the arrow fly and the pirate fell on top of him. There was a horrible pause as she thought the cutlas had run him through but he shoved the man off him and starting fighting again.

Spinning round so Roland was between her and the mast she drew her sword, swinging wildly and relying on pure luck and force. But as two fell, three replaced them. The sword was heavy, and her arm tired quickly, being unused to the motion.

It was over relatively quickly. They threw her and Roland roughly against the gunnel along with the few crew members who'd survived, including Sam, Lt. Gilmartin and Captain Brown, and tied their hands together with rope as their captain came aboard by way of a gangplank placed across the two ships. John was pressed against her side, and she could feel blood seeping from a wound on his leg through the material of her dress.

The captain strode slowly along the line, studying them as if they were a herd of sheep for sale at market. He stopped in front of Regina, a look of surprise crossing his weather-beaten, scarred face.

"And what's a pretty lady like you doing on his ship?"

"I needed passage somewhere, he offered it."

"For a price, I gather? Such a lovely lady, I fear it wasn't all monetary, eh lads?" he sneered, the pirates behind him sniggering horribly.

"My honour is intact. I care not for his." He grabbed her hand suddenly, forcing her ring finger painfully out of its fist to slip the ring off.

"Please! That's...my wedding ring." The words felt strange on her tongue but she hoped he didn't hear the slight hesitancy. She was wearing it in Robin's name after all, if she was claiming Roland as her son. She grabbed for it as she spoke but he taunted her with it.

"I think I'll hang on to this for a bit." He put it on his little finger and admired it right in front of her face, speaking so nonchalantly he could have been discussing the weather. "You've got fire though. That's good. Women don't survive at sea without fire. Ironic, really. Normally fire's a bad thing, especially at sea where the only thing between you and a watery grave is a few planks of wood."

Roland let out a slight whimper; Regina knew even without that that he was trying his best to put a brave face on and not cry. The pirate - who hadn't even had the courtesy to introduce himself yet - knelt in front of him.

"He yours?"

"Yes."

"How old are you?"

"He's five. And no, I'm not telling you his name."

"Well. I don't think we'll make them walk the plank - yet. Put 'em all in the brig." He began to stalk off when one of his men called out,

"What about the ship?"

"Ship's got a nasty breach in her. She'll sink before we get her into port. But wait," a nasty sneer twisted his mouth as his gaze flew to Captain Brown. "Aren't captains meant to go down with their ships? Tie him to the mast." He crossed the gangplank without a second glance, but Regina felt sick as they were dragged down to the pirate brig. Jerry was still stabled down below. She hadn't had a chance to see him since the voyage began and now her trusty steed was about to be left in the hold of a sinking ship. And they were leaving a man on board without any hope of escape. While she didn't trust him she wouldn't wish that fate on anyone. What had she gotten herself into by taking that passage?


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a bit of a filler chapter so it's quite short…

The brig stank. All the usual ship smells - tar, seasalt, lantern smoke - were mingled with old sweat, urine, mouldy bread and blood. Regina was beyond caring. Her muscles ached, her head hurt, her stomach was groaning for food and her beautiful Jerry was facing death by either starvation or drowning, neither a pleasant prospect. And all she could think about as she tried to sleep was the pirates she'd shot, stabbed, kicked overboard. What if they had sons, back home? Wives? Elderly mothers to take care of, and the only money they could get was by piracy? It haunted her. Their twisted faces found their way into her nightmares and it was all she could do to stay positive for Roland. His little face reminded her every day of Robin and sometimes she wished the boy hadn't been persistent enough to get aboard the ship.  
She had no idea how long they were left in there. It seemed like an age, made longer by Sam's still relentless pursuit. He would sit next to her, touch her waist, cheek, put his hand on her leg and keep it there, no matter how many times she asked him to stop. Eventually John, who was emotionally numb and physically hurting from the fighting himself, stepped up.  
"Look here, Sam. It's bad enough that you're pursuing a married woman, but the fact that we are now in a pirate brig, our lives in the hands of those barbarians up there, should be deterrent enough? She's asked you to stop. Now I'm telling you."  
"You're the cabin boy, you hold nothing over me!"  
"Actually, he's right," one of the other sailors spoke up. "In front of her son too. It's not what you'd call honourable."  
The others murmured their agreement. Sam, disgruntled, moved away from her, muttering to himself. Regina caught some of it: "Captain allowed me, why do I need the permission of a stupid woman?"  
That, as well as the others' unwillingness to say anything before, irked her. "Oi." He turned his head only to be met with a resounding slap across the cheek. "Bastard." The others looked impressed.  
"As for the rest of you, if you believe something, just say it! Could have saved me a lot of trouble." She sank back against the bars in a huff. At least they've got the decency to look sheepish, she thought to herself while sending them all death glares.  
Her outburst was met with applause from the staircase. The hollow sound rang through the brig.  
"Well well. Seems we have a feisty little one on our hands, don't we?" The captain unlocked the door and shoved her to her feet. "You're coming with me."  
"Mama!"  
"Oh, it's all right, little man. Your mama's coming back. Don't you worry." He cackled and pushed her up the stairs so hard she fell over the hem of her dress.  
Up in the captain's cabin she was subjected to an intrigued scrutiny. She refused the wine he offered her, fearful of poison; all the time she was looking for a weakness, something he might reveal that might help her make an escape. She had no idea how long she'd been stood there before she asked, somewhat irritated:  
"Would you mind telling me what you dragged me up here for?"  
"You're a special one."  
"What makes you think that?"  
"You're married, with a son, clearly not skilled in combat yet here you are, a survivor of a pirate attack. How?"  
"That's exactly what I've been wondering myself," she responded wryly.  
"You didn't answer my question."  
"Luck, I suppose."  
"And? There must be something else."  
"I guess I have something to live for."  
"Your son."  
"Yes." She would have smiled if the expression on the boy's face when she was dragged away, and the rapidly diminishing chances of them ever seeing his father again, weren't foremost in her mind.  
"You know, I have a daughter."  
"Really?" Her interest wasn't faked - maybe here was something to her advantage.  
"Oh, yes. Believe it or not I was a merchant sailor before I turned pirate. She and her mother are back home, where they're safe. She'd be eight by now." He picked up a miniature portrait.  
"Is that her?"  
He turned the picture round - there was a crude sketch of a girl, no older than three, in a woman's arms.  
"I thought you said she was eight."  
"I didn't. I said she would be eight. If she were alive today." His eyes took on the steel they'd had before. "They're both dead. Killed by the roadside by a runaway horse while I was in the shop opposite. That's why I joined the pirates. Never have to go back on land."  
Regina kept silent as he seemed to get lost in his own thoughts.  
"Captain?"  
"Get out. Back to the brig."  
"Yes, sir." She backed out only to run into the bosun who was standing just outside. He gripped her upper arm and dragged her back down, shoving her in with no mercy whatsoever. She hit her head on the opposite wall, blacking out immediately.


	10. Chapter 10

"Mrs. Mills? Can you hear me?"

A young male voice was sounding from above her as her eyes came back into focus. It took a while for them to adjust to the darkness but when she did the first thing she saw was Roland as he promptly threw his arms around her.  
"I thought you were dead."

"Roland, look at me. Would I ever leave you?" Wrong question to ask: she saw in his eyes the memory of that day at the docks. It all seemed worlds away now.

"I wish... I wish Papa were here."

"Papa's waiting for us. We'll find him."

"Are you all right, Mrs. Mills? You hit your head pretty firmly."

"Bit of a headache but yes, I'm fine. Under the circumstances of course. How's your leg?"

"Hurting. But I think it's closing over."

"That's good."

"There's some rations here, we made Sam taste it and it's not poisoned."

***

Over the next day or so (it was hard to keep track of time in the darkness) she tried to converse with the others, but only John was willing to talk. The others seemed resigned to a fate of walking the plank.

Their fears were realised one morning when the bosun came and dragged them all out and up onto deck. A plank of wood was balanced on the gunnels, most of it sticking out above the open water and the rest weighted down.

"Untie those three," the captain ordered as he strode down the ladder from the wheel. Regina, John and Roland were unchained from the others and pushed to one side. "They're safe, for now."

Roland buried his head against her side. She covered his ears as the others were all made to walk the plank.

Back down in the brig, where they'd been dumped without any explanation of why they were spared, Regina finally spoke the wish that had been running round her head.

"I just want to get back on land."

"Me too. And I was the one who ran away to sea."

A few more moments of silence, broken only by Roland sucking on his thumb.

"Roland, please. You're a big boy now."

"How about we amscré?" John murmured into her ear, too low for the watch to hear.

"Huh? English, please. I'm not well-versed in sailor-speak."

 

"It's not sailor-speak, it's code for scram. Escape." She had to bend her ear right to his mouth to hear him but the word lit up some hope in her heart.

"How?"

"I've a photographic memory. I've memorised the way from here to the deck, where the boats are..."

"Really? I have paper somewhere, write it down!"

"I'll have to code it, we don't want them realising," he warned as she fumbled in the bag still round her waist and drew out paper and pencil.

They fell to their plan with gusto. Watch changeover times were noted, any lateness, names and ranks where they could catch them, mealtimes, everything they could get was noted on the crumpled scraps of paper still in Regina's hidden bag. They also worked out a code - no one listened when they started talking in numbers, thinking it was an attempt to teach Roland. And in a way it was. They didn't want him accidentally saying something, plus she didn't know how much of the three Rs Roland even knew.

***

"Right. This is when the best time would be, as it'll be dark but there will likely be a watch on deck. Your dress will be seen in the moonlight."

Regina looked down at the pale dress, now spattered with blood, dirt and the grime which inevitably comes from wearing it for days on end. She was used to the grime now, but she didn't like the blood which was by now going brown.  
"We might have to grime you up a bit more. Not yet, just when we decide to go. Luckily you've got dark hair so that won't be a problem."

"So when are we doing this?"

"I don't know...I have an idea. Maybe you could plead faintness when number 7's on watch, he's weaker, he'll let you have a walk on deck. I'll insist on accompanying you, I doubt these pirates trust each other when it comes to women and I certainly don't trust them. I'll bring Roland, then we'll knock him out and hijack the boat that's always hanging off the starboard side."

"That's a good plan, except we don't know how far away we are from land."

"The ship's been at sea for a while now. Haven't you noticed, they're bringing less rations and with longer intervals? That means they're saving it. They'll be working their way back to pick up provisions from some secret hideout and there's no islands in this ocean. They've got to get back to the mainland. Mind you, I don't know how far away from civilisation we'll be..."

"Roland grew up in the forest and I spent a while there too. I think I know enough for us to survive. And I don't know if this will be relevant, or needed, but," she bent to whisper into his ear, "the captain's wife and daughter were killed five years ago. Maybe I could plead that if we're caught."

"Don't say that." He touched the wooden planking of the inside of the ship. "Touch wood we won't need to." Regina tapped the wood too, not entirely sure why but it was clearly a superstition of some kind and they needed all the luck they could get.

A couple of nights later, they were able to put their plan into action. They'd saved as much as they could from their rations of stale bread and water, which were now in Regina's ever so useful bag, and the sailor they'd given the number 7 was on the midnight to two o'clock watch. They planned to do it near the end so he was tired.

At about 1:30, when he started to droop, Regina suddenly groaned and bent over, head on her knees and rocking back and forth.

"Is she all right?" They'd learnt that he was also the one most afraid of dealing with women so it was easy for John to persuade him she needed air. He tentatively put a gruff hand on her arm to steady her as he locked John back in. The latter then pick pocketed the burly, unobservant pirate's keys and stealthily followed him with Roland, who was asleep.  
On deck, no one was about. Roland was gently laid in one of the lifeboats hanging off the side, then Regina spun round and knocked the pirate over the head with the handle of her knife, kneeing his groin for good measure. He fell silently, an impressive feat for one so large.

"You get in, I'll wind it down and climb after you."

He helped her in, and she held Roland to her as he started to slowly turn the crank. It was tricky, but he managed to get the tiny boat most of the way down the hull before the mechanism creaked. It was relatively quiet, but sounded like a cannon shot in the stillness of the night.

Without a second thought John scrambled down the rope.

"Get down!" he ordered as he slashed the ropes with Regina's knife. She slid off the seat and curled into a ball, using her body to protect Roland as the boat crashed down onto the water. The shock - of course - woke the boy up, and alerted the pirates while John fumbled for the oars. The sea was calm so there was no worry about being tossed on the waves, but she recognised the sounds of preparing for cannon fire.

"I think they're firing at us!" she whispered urgently, pistol shots resounding around them and splashing into the water.

"Keep your head down. Protect your boy."

John was a strong rower, even on prison rations and with a badly injured leg, and they were soon out of the accurate range of the cannons. However, Regina refused to believe they'd made it until they were on land.

They spent days floating on the open sea, taking turns rowing to keep warm. Roland sat on Regina's lap and held the oars too, though he wasn't much help it kept him warm which was the most important thing. The temperature was dropping rapidly, helped by the sea breeze, and whoever wasn't rowing got the only cloak among them, which was Roland's. They weren't too far away but their food ran out half a day's row from shore, so by the time the little dinghy glided into the bay they were all starving, freezing and tired from not sleeping for a few days.


	11. Chapter 11

The autumn sun was just beginning to set when the boat finally ground to a halt on the shingle beach. Regina stumbled out, practically crying with relief to be back on land. She was, however, still used to the motion of the sea so she had to take a moment before lifting Roland out of the boat, then helping John. They both fell, exhausted, to the floor, but Regina didn't have the heart to move them.

Instead, she slipped into the woods growing about a hundred metres inland and fashioned a small cross from two twigs, tying them together with a loose thread pulled from the seam of her bag. She found a small nook underneath a bush and stuck the cross in the ground, writing a name in the dirt in front of it with her finger.

"Goodbye, Jerry. Thank you for everything."

She wiped away the tears that threatened to fall before going back out to the others, who were just coming up the shingle.

"Are you all right?" John asked.

"I'm fine."

Roland let go of John's hand and held out his arms to be carried. She happily complied, and started walking along the animal-trodden path.

They walked a little way into the trees, eventually finding a decent spot to camp for the night. If it could even be called camping, sleeping under bushes with only each other for warmth.

Once they'd settled on a clearing, she took a deep breath in order to calm herself. What did she have? She still had her knife; the letter tucked inside her bodice which was now rather redundant but nevertheless, she knew where it was, and therefore no one else knew what was in it; the lighting flints; Roland's berry-sniffing nose.

 _Right. You can do this_ , she told herself. _You can get to civilisation, reunite John with his family, keep Roland safe. Then you can..._ Her train of thought derailed. Then she can what? Even if she wanted to, she could never leave Roland. Not now. But she couldn't make Robin leave his Merry Men in order to cross the border to safety from Cora, which had been her original plan that long-ago day.

"Mrs. Mills?"

"Please, Regina's fine," she muttered distractedly. A pregnant silence fell. Even Roland knew she'd said something wrong and hid his face with his hands, peeking out between his fingers.

"What?"

"I though you said your name was Rebecca?"

"Oh. Oh!" She looked round quickly. She couldn't see anyone but stepped closer and dropped her voice just in case. "Yes, I did. I'm so sorry, John, I made that up. You see, I'm... I was... running away, and I knew it would be easier if I had an alias. My real name's Regina."

"It's ok. I get it. Should I even be calling you Mrs. Mills?" He emphasised the Mrs, glancing down at her now empty ring hand and she sighed, knowing she'd have to come out with it sooner or later.

"No. Technically I am engaged unless my fiancé's broken it off since my disappearance, but I'm not married, nor have I ever been. It was an arranged marriage."

"So, Roland...?"

"He's... this is very complicated. He's not mine. Though he may as well be." She looked down at him fondly - he'd found a stick and was forming shapes in the dirt with the end of it.

"Well, we have time for explanations. I'm not judging. My own sister had a child out of wedlock. But I think the most important thing right now is to get shelter and food."

"You're right. But can we keep that alias until I know where we are and who we've got to deal with?"

"Fine by me. Come on, you rascal!" He swept Roland up, making the boy giggle like he used to do back when he was with his father. Maybe it was just the relief of being back where he was comfortable but he was smiling and laughing again. She didn't have the heart to tell him she had no idea where they were.

As Regina no longer had her bow, she sent Roland to find some berries so she and John could track something more substantial. Eventually they found a rabbit on the point of dying - both agreed it would be better to put it out of its misery though Regina almost threw up as she plunged the blade into its heart.

"I hope you know how to cook this. The cook didn't want me anywhere near the galley, claimed I was a pickpocket."  
"Considering how easily you got those keys off the guard I'd say his concern wasn't unfounded," she joked. "And I think I do."

It was messy, but eventually she managed to skin and cut the meat up into sizeable portions. She spared a thought for Friar Tuck as she rotated the crude spit over the campfire, grateful that she'd had the foresight to listen to his advice and wondering for the millionth time what had happened to them.

"I'm going to turn in now," John said as soon as they'd finished eating. "Put that fire out, we don't want to roast to death."

"Actually, I'm going to keep it going. It's getting into autumn, and we don't want to be some wild animal's prey." He shrugged and lay down underneath a smaller bush. Regina wrapped up the remaining meat in the few leaves still green, readjusted the rocks around the fire to ensure it didn't spread then wrapped Roland's cloak around him.

"Can I have a bedtime story?" he asked imploringly as they curled up.

She smiled wistfully at the rememberance of that fateful first night in the forest.

"Which one would you like?"


	12. Chapter 12

They fell into a routine over the next few weeks. Regina was forced to take the lead - John knew nothing about the woods, having grown up in a large town, and though Roland knew which berries were good to eat she had to be responsible for all of their safety. Now she had two to take care of it was harder, as both had their irritating moments of being completely uncooperative and would sometimes gang up on her. It was well meant banter but she sometimes wished she could give them a good slap and get it out of her system.

When he was cooperative she continued to teach Roland, moving onto letters. She'd write the alphabet in the dirt beside the fire, and give him random spelling tests to pass the time as they walked. John wasn't too good on his spelling either, and Regina took some pleasure out of their improvement as the woods started to thin and the undergrowth no longer seriously hampered them.

Just before the woods petered out, Roland, who'd been running ahead, came scampering back with something scrunched in his hand.

"Mama, I found this on the ground. It's bad to leave things lying around, right?"

"Good boy," she praised him. Straightening it out, she let out an involuntary gasp and scrunched it in her fist again.

"What is it?"

"Nothing. Let's keep going."

She stuffed it into her bag but as they walked she couldn't shake the words on the paper from her mind's eye:

"WANTED ALIVE. REWARD FOR RETURN TO KING LEOPOLD. BELIEVED TO BE TAKEN BY THIS DANGEROUS OUTLAW"

Above the writing was a sketch of her; underneath, one of Robin.

***

They trudged through barren field after barren field, the only sign of life they saw being sheep in a far-off patch and the occasional copse of trees, in which they would usually take shelter for the night. They continued to follow the small stream Regina had found as far as they could, and her bag was now full of meat wrapped in the last remnants of living leaves she could pick from the trees and some kindling for fires. It was getting rapidly colder and they were all tired from the endless walking, so when John stumbled over a rock and reopened his wound from the pirate fight she really began to doubt their chances of success.

That evening, she ripped the cleanest section from the bottom of her dress, scrubbed it as well as she could in the river and bound his leg with it. He fell asleep immediately, faint and worn out, and Regina felt like doing the same but Roland was bouncing on her lap, insisting on a lesson. She wondered yet again where he got all his energy from.

"Mama?"

"You don't have to call me that any more, Roland," she half-told him off. He considered for a moment before twisting round to face her.

"Mama," he insisted. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine, darling."

"No you're not. Please smile?" He put his fingers to her face and pushed the corners of her mouth up, giggling at the tight grimace it resulted in. "I believe in you." That made her smile, even if there were tears in her eyes as she hugged him tight.

"Let's go to sleep, Roland. I'll teach you tomorrow."

She was glad he knew she wasn't ok, as he just accepted it, giving her a goodnight kiss before they fell asleep.  
It was the small hours when she woke with a sharp pain in her ribs and a dull dread in her heart, the image of Robin lying, bruised, bloody and dying in a ditch on the side of the road burned into her mind's eye. She shook her head, trying to rid herself of the nightmare.

"Mama?"

"I'm all right. Go back to sleep."

"I can't. I'm scared."

"There's nothing to be afraid of. I'm here."

"I can hear an animal. It sounds big." The tremor of fear in his voice was very real, so she listened carefully. There was definitely something coming, and the fire had died so there was no protection from any potential predator.

She slithered out from underneath their bush and gave him a leg up into the nearest tree, as high as she could reach without him being in danger of falling off.

"Hold on to the trunk." He knew enough to be quiet as she tried to hoist John up into another tree, his leg making him awkward to move.

Just then, a massive wolf appeared in the clearing, eyes blood-red in the darkness and fixed directly on her. Regina quickly tucked her skirt up and swung herself into the tree with only a second to spare as the wolf snapped at her ankles. She wrapped her arms round John's waist to keep him on the bough, Roland's panicked face looking at her across the clearing as he gripped the trunk of the tree with his little arms and legs, making a clear effort not to cry out. Making eye contact with him she smiled reassuringly, always keeping one eye on the wolf as it sniffed round the bushes they'd been sleeping under.

When it finally slunk off in the direction they'd come she let out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding. Putting her finger on her lips she listened intently until she was absolutely sure there were no more wolves on the prowl. She slipped down as silently as possible, catching John and laying him down. He was either asleep or unconscious, she hoped the former.

"Roland, come on down now."

He was frozen in his position, hands clinging to the bark and legs clamped fiercely round the branch.

"Come on, Roland, I've got you." No amount of coaxing would unfreeze him so she climbed up, gently placing her hands over his to warm and loosen them. He slipped as she prised his hands off the trunk, crying out, but she caught him in her arms. He clung round her neck as she clambered down.

"I've got you. Shh, you're safe." She knew she had to find some sort of house, someone to take them in, or the poor boy would die of fright. She gently dabbed the blood away from his grazed hands using a handkerchief she'd found right at the bottom and miraculously still clean, then wiped his tears away. As she curled up with him again for a last few hours of sleep her thoughts went straight to his father. What would he say if and when she found him, or he her, and little Roland was scarred beyond recognition? Was Robin even alive? Her dream was still fresh in her mind, as vivid as that night in the stable.

It was a cruel, cruel world.


	13. Chapter 13

They woke after a few days to find a layer of snow over everything. Regina shook Roland and John until they woke, their sleepy groans dispelling her momentary panic. They did not want to get stuck out here, they had to keep moving. She managed to get the fire going to cook what little they had for breakfast and thaw their numb hands and feet, but insisted on setting off as soon as possible.

She'd had to support John since he'd opened his leg wound, and their progress was slow. Eventually they found themselves on a wide, though deserted, road, snow as yet undisturbed by carriages and footprints. It was still falling, and if Roland's hair was anything to go by she now looked like some kind of snow maiden. She ruffled the top of his head to get the snow off and pulled his hood up over his curls, which were now looking very long and straggly, before standing John up from the rock onto which he'd sunk for a rest. His arm over her shoulders, hers round his waist, she once again thanked her lucky stars he was young and lightly built.

The road, thankfully, was rough, so not too slippery, but Roland fell over a few times before she eventually made a slight detour into the plantation of trees on either side of the road to find him a stick. It wasn't long, however, before John simply could not go on. He collapsed in a heap, lips going blue. Nothing Regina could say or do would rouse him.

"John, please! I'm sure there's a house nearby, I swear I saw a roof. Please!" She shook him, but he was barely conscious. Putting her hand on his chest, she felt a weak pulse and knew there wasn't much time.

"Is he dead?"

"No, he is not dead. But he will be if we stay here. Are you all right?"

"I'm cold."

"I know."

"And wet."

"I know, dear. Can you carry this?" She handed her bag to Roland, then took John's arm and somehow managed to get him across her shoulders. She was only little - people were so much heavier when unconscious - and staggered a bit, but managed to start walking nevertheless. Roland traipsed along behind.

She heard footsteps behind her about ten minutes later, and moved closer to the side of the road to let whoever it was past, Roland walking as close to her as possible. He was looking down at the ground, bottom lip quivering as he concentrated on not falling.

"Excuse me?"

Regina turned with difficulty. A young girl in a blue hooded cloak was standing there, carrying a basket full of groceries. She looked deliciously warm in her fur-lined muff and boots and her accent had a strange lilt to it that she'd never heard before.

"Can I help you?" Regina asked warily, her tone weary with concern.

"I was actually wondering if I could help you. Is he all right?"

"He's badly injured. I need to get him some help or he won't see tomorrow."

"I can help at my castle. Wait here, I'll call my carriage."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course! I might be a princess but I'm not so ill-disposed to the poor that I'd leave them to die."  
"Thank you, err...?"

"Oh, I'm dreadfully sorry! I'm Belle."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd forgotten just how bloody _short_ some of these chapters were...


	14. Chapter 14

"Ah! Here's the carriage. Hello, Father," she smiled at the elderly man who opened the door.

"Hello, dear."

"These people need help and I've offered it, is that all right?"

"What's your name, miss?" he asked Regina, who bowed her head quickly on remembering Belle was a princess, therefore her father must be King of whatever land they'd found themselves in. John on her back made it impossible to curtsey.

"Mrs. Mills, Your Grace."

"Married?" His tone worried her. She hoped he hadn't seen the poster, which was no doubt pasted all over the forest and in all neighbouring areas.

"Yes. This is my son, and my...younger brother." This web of lies was becoming so complex. They could be friend's of Cora's, she couldn't be too careful.

"Father..."

"All right. Come on." He helped lift John into the carriage; it was spacious enough for all five of them. Regina was suddenly very conscious of just how dirty and bedraggled they were.

They rolled up a gravel drive to a small castle only ten minutes later, and the three of them were hurried upstairs. John was taken to one room, Regina and Roland another just across the hall from him.

Belle ran round, organising the most experienced servants to John's room and drawing baths for them herself as the rest of them were in the process of getting lunch ready.

"I'll bathe your son for you, if that's ok? I'm sure you'd like to rest after your journey." Regina hesitated, needing a break but not entirely sure. Eventually her desire to relax won over. Not to mention self-consciousness in front of someone else's son.

"Thank you, I'd appreciate it. His name is Roland, but don't mention fathers," she murmured quickly.

"Why not?"

 

"I'll explain later."

"All right. Come on, Roland."

"I'll be here when you come back, Roland, ok?" He nodded and followed the girl meekly. Regina dumped her rags - it was the only word for them now - in a corner and allowed herself to sink into the hot water, letting it warm her through and soothe her aching muscles. Finally. She didn't mind the woods, actually, she rather liked them when she had a tent to sleep under, but the ships had left her feeling completely disgusting. It was nice to appreciate what she'd always taken for granted before.  
She lay there for ages, but it still didn't feel like long enough by the time the water started to get cold. She quickly washed her hair, scrubbed the grime off and clambered out, relishing the soft robe against her clean skin.

 

As she crashed onto the easy chair that stood by the fireplace the door opened and a clean, smiling Roland ran in. She lifted him onto her lap as he babbled on about nothing in particular.  
Belle followed him, carrying a tray with two portions of food on.

 

"Here. It's not much but you don't want to overeat after going hungry."

"How's John?"

"Your brother? He's all right. The doctor's just left, he had to operate but he will be back in the morning to check on him. You can talk to him then."

"Thank you, your Highness. You've been too kind already."

"Please, just call me Belle. I don't mind, neither does Father when we're at home."

"All right then. Belle."

"What's your name? I don't believe you ever said it."

"Oh. Rebecca."

"It's pretty. Look, I'll be back in a bit."

"Belle? Could you possibly bring some paper and a pencil? Roland hasn't had a lesson in a few days."  
"Of course."

 

"Thank you for the bath!" Roland called after her. Regina got up, flopping him gently into the chair before fetching the plates. With the tray on his lap, robe and blanket tucked around him and his curls freshly washed and bouncing, he'd never looked more adorable. She was reminded for the millionth time of Robin's smile, the crease lines round his eyes, the wonderful way he never took anything for granted. Clearly he'd passed those traits on to his son.

When Belle came back, she was accompanied by her father. Now she'd had a bath Regina didn't feel quite so inferior but she still wasn't sure how to act. She had been brought up a lady, but had thrown that away to escape. As far as they were concerned she was a peasant, so she stood up when they came in.

"Mrs Mills, your brother is sleeping. We should not disturb him; you can speak with the doctor in the morning."

"Thank you, Your Majesty."

"You can stay here as long as you need. You shall have free reign of the house and gardens, but don't go into the room adjacent to yours."

Roland cocked his head to the side. "Why not?"

"Because, young man, I say so." The king bent in front of the boy. "Can you do that for me?"

"Yes, sir."

 

"Your clothes are currently in the wash, they'll be ready by tomorrow morning. In the meantime would you like to borrow something of mine?"

"Oh, no, I couldn't. This'll be fine until then."

"You haven't brought any other clothes with you. You'll have to get some new ones at some point, and we're about the same height. And it's ripped."

"I do have a little money though, I can get some."

"Clothing is expensive around here, it's much cheaper to get material but then they take so long to make! I insist."

"I'd listen to her, madam. She can be very persuasive when she wants to be, though she does spend most of her time with her nose in a book!" The king smiled fondly down at his daughter who, sure enough, had a book tucked into a scarf tied over her shoulder as a makeshift pocket.

"All right."

 

"And I shall now make a swift departure and leave you ladies to discuss clothing. I shall be in my presence chamber if you need anything." He kissed Belle's forehead before exiting the room. Regina waited for the door to close before speaking.

"Belle, before we talk clothes. Which land are we in?"

"We're in the Enchanted Forest, on the far north-eastern coast. We're a small kingdom, but maybe you know of King Leopold's? It's the next one over, to the south, and by far the largest in this land." She barely paused as Regina took in this information, immediately launching into practicalities.

"I'll be honest, I don't know much about clothing. But here's one of my everyday gowns, you can borrow it until yours is washed."

 

"Thank you." She slipped behind the concertina screen and pulled the blue gown the nurse brought in over her head. Belle was slim but she was well-fed, and the dress was a little big round the waist. She came out feeling somewhat self-conscious.

Belle, meanwhile, was showing Roland some of the pictures in her book. He suddenly clapped his hands in front of his eyes: Belle held the book up to show a prince and princess kissing on their wedding day, a small smile lighting up her features. Regina laughed.

"Kissing's disgusting."

Regina came and sat down in the chair, pulling him onto her lap. A rough, tired-looking girl poked her head through the door.

"Miss, can you spare a moment?"

"Of course, Celia, I'll be right there. I've got to go, Rebecca. You can borrow these for as long as you need and if you want to go outside I'll lend you a cloak."

"Thank you, Belle."

She ruffled Roland's hair and left. Regina opened the book at the first page and started reading aloud, running her finger along the lines of text so he could follow.

She didn't notice when he fell asleep, she was so lost in the world the book offered.


	15. Chapter 15

"I can't sleep," Roland murmured that night, snuggling further into her shoulder.

"That's because you fell asleep earlier."

There was a pause of about ten seconds before he spoke again.

"Still can't sleep."

Regina smiled to herself even as she rolled her eyes.

"Close your eyes and think of something nice. Or count sheep, that always worked for me."

"One, two, three, four..."

 

"In your head, Roland dear."

Half an hour later he was fidgeting again.

"What is it this time?"

"The bed feels strange."

She was about to scoff when she remembered something Daniel had once told her about a dog he rescued, who'd absolutely refused to sleep in the comfortable bed he'd made him because he was so used to lying on the hard streets and in rubbish dumps. Maybe it was the same situation here. Roland had, after all, slept rough his whole life. She'd willingly bet her locket the only bed he'd ever slept in was the ship's bunk and that hadn't been at all pleasant. Dragging the warmest blanket and a pillow off the bed, she created a little nest for him on the carpeted floor.

"What are you doing?"

"You're used to sleeping on the ground. Maybe it will help you drop off."

"I can't drop off if I'm already on the floor."

Regina laughed, glad to see he hadn't lost his innocent black-and-white view on things as she kissed him and climbed back into bed, letting herself sink into the comforter and falling asleep immediately, tiredness outweighing everything she had to deal with.

She woke with the dawn chorus next morning and revelled in the luxury of being able to just lie there and do nothing. No food to cook, no cold or predators to worry about. At least not directly. Looking over at Roland she saw him curled up under the blanket, thumb in his mouth and smiling in his sleep. He looked so peaceful.

Her hand went to her chest, feeling for her grandmother's locket which she hadn't thought about in months. It wasn't there. Throwing the covers back she searched her bag and the room as thoroughly as she could while not making any noise but to no avail. Eventually she concluded sadly that it must have either snagged on a branch or gotten lost at sea. Regina couldn't help feeling a little nostalgic for that locket. It contained the only likeness of Daniel, who was fading from her memory with every passing day, plus it was the only thing her father's mother had ever given to her. She hadn't even been born then, but as the story went old Mother Lucas had somehow known the unborn baby would be a girl, whilst Cora had been adamant it would be a boy. Not to be deterred by her prickly daughter-in-law she'd left the baby her precious locket in her will, to be given to her as her father deemed appropriate. He had presented it to her as soon as she was big enough not to swallow it, and Regina had worn it ever since much to her mother's distaste.

Picking up the book that still lay open from last night she fastened the robe over her borrowed nightgown and curled up in the easy chair, not bothered about the actual story for she knew what happened. Instead she looked wistfully at the pictures: of the first meeting and instant spark, the first time he held her in his arms, the first kiss, then finally the happy couple framed in a heart-shape of flowers held up by little birds. The two looked so content, their happy ever after was just beginning. It felt like she'd never get hers, what with displeased mothers and stalker kings, creepy captains and vicious pirates. Not to mention the fact that the man she... Roland's father, she reminded herself, could be anywhere by now. She still couldn't get the image of him injured out of her head, and she just knew something had happened to him. She didn't know what she'd do if he were... No. She couldn't think like that. Roland was depending on him being alive; to be honest, so was she. She wanted to have someone to hold her, tell her things would be all right, just once. She was only nineteen, her father had still sometimes taken pleasure in spoiling her before her engagement and she didn't feel she could go on much longer if she couldn't break down the façade to someone soon. Or was she twenty now? Her birthday was in winter but she'd lost track of the days.

"Morning!" Belle breezed in with a tray of breakfast just then, causing Regina to close the book quickly.

 

"Shh! He's still asleep."

"Oh! Sorry!" She placed the tray gently on the dresser, laying the tea and toast by the fire to keep warm. "How did you sleep?"

"Very well, thank you. Yourself?"

"Oh, as usual. What's he doing on the floor?"

"He was born in the forest, used to sleeping rough. He couldn't sleep in bed and I thought it would help."

"Well, clearly it did. Listen, I'd love to stay and chat but there's a wedding service in the village to prepare for. You two don't have to go, Father's all right with that. Just keep quiet, and of course that room there's out of bounds."

"A wedding?"

"I know, it's an unusual time but who are we to argue with love? And when that's done there's the New Year ball to prepare for."

"Wow. Can I..." Belle immediately interrupted the start of her offer to help.

"Here's a cloak you can borrow, and all your clothes back clean for you."

"This dress isn't mine. There's no rip at the bottom, and the material is darker."

"Isn't it? It must have gotten mixed up with the servants'..."

"Belle."

"All right. Your dress was beyond saving so, I got you a new one. I hope you don't mind."

Regina stood up and fished around in her bag for the remnants of the money Robin had given her when she'd left the docks, holding out the meagre handful of coins. Belle shook her head.

"No. I can't take the only money you have left!"

"I owe you for the dress if nothing else."

"Mrs Mills, I can't. I don't care about the money."

"Please?"

"You need to provide for your family. Do you have anywhere to go when you leave here?"

"No," she admitted, cheeks hot with embarrassment.

"You'll need the money to find yourself somewhere to stay, buy food."

Regina was about to say she thought they might just stay in the woods as she sort of knew what she was doing there but bit it back just in time. The poster was still ingrained in her mind's eye.

"I know."

Belle closed Regina's fist around the coins with her hands.

"Then please, don't even think about paying me back, for any of this. We don't need it. You do. Consider it an act of unselfish kindness, as I gather from your persistence that you haven't had many of those directed your way."

Regina could only try and control her blush at how easy the girl read her as she put the money away, asking after John's wellbeing to try and distract her.

"Asleep, but fitfully. The doctor will be here soon, but I think it's best you don't see him yet. We don't want to distress him."

"I understand." Belle smiled and bustled out, book bouncing in the scarf at her hip. Regina was amazed at the girl's work ethic. When she was fourteen she spent all her time in the fields with Daniel, skiving on any work she could unless it involved running errands to town for the servants when Cora overworked them.

"Morning sleepyhead," she joked as Roland poked his head up from under the nest of blankets, hair tousled and mouth open in a wide yawn.

"Sleep alright?"

"Mmf." He plopped himself down on the floor in front of the tray, the very picture of not-a-morning-person, but she hoiked him to his feet.

"Come on. Can't have you looking like that, such a handsome young man as you!" She combed his hair and washed his hands and face before handing him a plate.

"Papa never washes his hands before meals," he pouted.

"Well, your Papa doesn't have to have table manners in the forest. We're in a castle now, we have to be polite."

"But there's no one here!"

"It does no harm to start now. You are going to be such a handsome, polite young gentleman that by the time we find him he'll be very proud of you."

"Really?"

"I know it. When you're done we can go for a walk if you like, explore the gardens?"

"Mm-hm..."

"Don't talk with your mouth full." He swallowed, then tried again.

"Yes, please. Is there a lake?"

"I don't know," she replied honestly. Most grand castles did have ornamental lakes but hers hadn't. Even if they did it would probably be frozen over.

When he was done, she stacked the plates neatly on the tray and placed it outside the door (she wasn't even going to try finding the servants' quarters without help, she didn't want to get lost or go anywhere she wasn't supposed to but she still felt bad for leaving it) before turning to help Roland on with his clothes. To her surprise he had managed to pull his trousers on and was trying to pull the overshirt over his head.

"I'm stuck!"

Regina smiled and helped him untangle his flailing arms and put them in the sleeves instead of through the neck hole, then fastened his cloak and bent to help him with his bootlaces. Doubling the knots so they wouldn't come undone she left a note saying where they'd gone before walking along the corridor their room was on, replaying the previous day's rush in her mind to try and find the way out. Negotiating the disorientating balcony and going down the grand stairs she heaved open the large oak door and they stepped out into the crisp, cool air, snow crunching beneath their feet as they left the gravel drive for the softer grass.

"Can I build a snowman?"

"We should probably get more out of the way of the house first." Regina headed past a frozen fountain, evergreen bushes topped with caps of snow and a walled garden before finding a large, empty patch of ground, not too far from the castle but still fairly out of sight. It was surrounded partly by the forest, partly a building and the rest by sturdy wooden fences.

"It should be ok here," she told Roland, who has bouncing up and down with excitement. He immediately ran off, rolling snow into a ball the size of his own small body. Regina leaned against the fence to watch him, trying to resist when he pulled her hand to join him but failing miserably as she fell forwards, completely losing her dignity as she tripped over the hem of her gown and tumbled into a drift.

She found herself lying in the snow an hour or two later, Roland pummelling her with soft snowballs while the snowmen they'd built together looked on, their twig mouths curved into smiles. Her sides hurt from laughing as she grabbed him and rolled over, tickling him mercilessly.

"Stop! Mama!!" He was crying with laughter, trying in vain to push her off him. His begging turned into more hysterics as she mock-growled and made to grab him, his hands coming up to squish her cheeks in an attempt to stop her tickling.

"Regina?" A strangely familiar voice broke through their mirth. Regina looked up, heart leaping into her throat as she recognised the man standing there, mouth agape, impossibly blue eyes locked on hers.

"Robin?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Lucas is Granny's surname too but I tend to go with my gut when naming characters, and Lucas was the first surname to pop into my head.


	16. Chapter 16

Regina was frozen on the spot and it had nothing whatsoever to do with the cold. Robin looked terrible. His eyes had dark circles underneath them, there were frown lines in place of the smile creases she loved and he looked so thin, frail almost, in the white nightgown and dark robe. Underneath, thick bandages could clearly be seen around his torso and his eyes had lost much of their sparkle. He was unkempt, and new scrapes, cuts and scars covered his handsome face. She was shocked at how much older he looked, and sickened by the sight. If she'd never asked for his help...

"Papa?" Roland had struggled out from underneath her arms, eyes falling on his father for the first time in months. Regina shook herself out of her reverie and put a hand on his shoulder to stop him from running to Robin, scared he'd knock him over just by hugging him but he seemed to be frozen to the spot as well. The man looked like he was about to faint.

Pushing herself up she managed to catch him before he hit the snow, Roland following at a slower pace. His forehead was boiling hot but his body shivered violently as he clung to her shoulders. His eyes were a strange mixture of pain and relief as they looked deep into hers, right past the façade she'd built up, the layers of strength and backstory she'd had to enforce to ensure Roland's safety.

Forcing herself to break the moment she lifted him onto his feet, his arm across her shoulders and hers round his waist, taking his full weight as they staggered back to the castle. She didn't have time to wonder how he got to be here, or even register the warmth flooding through her from where her hand touched his. Reaching the castle she went through the first door she came to - which was wide open and probably the route Robin had taken to get out - and called repeatedly for help.

"What is i... Mr. Locksley! Where have you been? We were worried sick!"

"He just came upon us in the garden."

"Come in here." Celia led them into a little parlour, clearly for the housekeeper's use. Regina guided Robin onto the sofa. "I'll call a manservant to help him back to his room." Robin managed to reach up and touch her cheek softly, whispering her name before he fell unconscious.

The next fifteen minutes were a blur; once he was safely reinstated in his bed, the fire stoked up and the doctor asked to stay a while longer Celia closed the window and ushered them through the connecting door back to their room.

"Thank you for finding him, I went out for two minutes and when I came back he'd disappeared."

"He was the one that found us. But you're welcome."

 

"I've got to go and see that Belle's all right with these wedding arrangements. Thanks again, miss." She curtseyed and left, the picture of politeness and humility, but Regina noticed something flash across her green eyes that made her feel somewhat nervous.

She crashed onto her bed, completely astounded by that whole encounter. A whirlpool of emotions flooded through her. Relief; fear; joy; sadness. Roland had crawled up beside her, fat tears rolling down his cheeks, no doubt at seeing the man he admired so much looking so weak. She slipped her arms around him and held him close, she needing the comfort almost as much as he did.

"It's all my fault. I'm so horrible!" he wailed. Regina muffled his loud sobs by hastily pulling him right into her chest so his head was over her heartbeat and he wouldn't wake the sleeping man in the next room.

"No..."

"I ran away from him. I wanted to give you your stone and didn't think the boat would go. I didn't think at all about my Papa and now he probably hates me."

"Hey. Look at me." She had to lift his chin up to face her, he was so horrified and embarrassed.

"All right, you shouldn't have run away."

 

Another muffled wail.

"But your stone got us through that storm. Who knows what might have happened if we hadn't had it? If you hadn't been there to give it to me?" While she didn't really believe it, her words seemed to work as he stopped sniffling quite so much. "Your father loves no one as much as he does you. I am sure he will forgive you but the best thing you can do for him right now would be to stay away until he is well enough to understand. All right?"

To her relief, he nodded. "But he saw you first."

"You were underneath me, I doubt anyone coming by would have seen you first."

"Do...do you think he will...die?"

"No. He is very ill but Doctor Donaldson says he will get better."

"I'm cold." Regina realised with a jolt that his clothes were soaked through from lying in the snow and he was shivering. Berating herself she built the fire up, set Roland on the floor in front of it and bundled blankets around him after hanging up his clothes on the clothes-horse. She changed her own sodden dress for the nightgown and set about finding something to make a hot drink in. Finding nothing she reluctantly pulled the bell, Celia opening the door suspiciously quickly.

"I'm dreadfully sorry, Celia but could you possibly bring up something hot to drink? Roland got a bit chilled playing in the snow."

"Right away, madam." Regina had never used the bell in her childhood house and she felt awful for taking advantage of it now, though the maid seemed only too happy to fetch it for her. And she'd never been called "madam" before.

She came back in ten minutes with two mugs of steaming tea on a tray.

"There you go, madam. Is there anything else I can get you?"

"No, thank you, Celia. Wait! How did Mr. Locksley, was it? get so badly injured?"

"He fell from his horse, faint with hunger and dropping from exhaustion only a few weeks ago. Belle found him on the roadside leading to the castle. Why do you ask?"

"I...nothing. Thank you for the tea."

So her nightmare of his injury wasn't her wild imagination thinking the worst, but some freaky sort of ethereal occurrence. She wasn't entirely sure what that meant but shoved it to the back of her mind to concentrate on Roland.

"Watch yourself, it's very hot. Blow on it." He obeyed, setting the mug on the floor and holding his hands above the steam. She sat on the window-seat, holding her own cup in hands not so numb as they should be after handling snow for so long. Outside she could just see their snowmen in what she now realised was the paddock where the horses must graze in summer. The building forming part of the boundary was the stable courtyard, and if she craned her neck she could see a small kitchen garden attached to the wall. It was a neat little layout, and she guessed the rest of the grounds were for summer entertaining and Belle's escape when she wanted to read. And obviously the display of power that kings so loved, she remembered bitterly.

As she gazed out on the crisp white landscape, disturbed only by their footprints and the forest in the background, her mind went back to Robin. Exhausted. Starving. Falling off his horse. Robin would never fall off unless he was seriously unwell or injured, or taken by surprise. He must have been found on the very road Belle had found them on.

She found herself wondering if Celia would have any motive whatsoever to turn in someone with a price on their head, even if they were injured. Servants weren't paid much, she knew, and some of them could be very unruly and selfish especially when they were looking at easy money.

"Mama, what are you looking at?" She quickly caught his mug as Roland clambered up onto the seat beside her, blanket falling from round his shoulders.

 

"Nothing," she replied, tucking it back round him. "It's a pretty view."

"Mm."

The rest of the day passed without event. Celia had obviously told Belle that she needn't be secretive about the out-of-bounds room now and Regina caught a stressed mumble from the girl as she came to clear away lunch. Feeling bad for not doing anything she spoke up.

"Look, Belle, do you need any help with anything?"

"No, I'm fine."

"No, you're not. I haven't been doing anything and I feel terrible. What do you need help with? Cleaning? Guests?"

"The servants are all drinking themselves silly, it was one of their friends getting married. If you could go in and watch Mr. Locksley for a while that'd be great. Just ring the bell if anything happens."

Regina gave Roland lots of paper and one of Belle's picture books to keep him occupied and slipped through the connecting door. Pausing for a moment she took in the sight before her. Robin was asleep, but thrashing around as if in a bad dream, the covers kicked to the end of the bed. She pulled them up to his chin, holding them firmly down as she pulled up a chair so he didn't immediately throw them off again. Taking the cloth left on the basin she began to bathe his hot forehead, holding it there for a few minutes. He started to quieten but still didn't sleep peacefully. Starting to panic slightly she begged him out loud to calm down. Then her worried tones became softer when he stopped thrashing quite so much, realising that talking was helping him as well as her. She spoke for hours, about little things, the happy moments she'd held onto in the time they'd spent apart. Like the time Roland decided to keep calling her Mama even though he knew he didn't have to. Finally getting back onto dry land. Realising he was alive. She didn't care if he could understand her or not, just being here with him and not having to hide anything was enough. At one point, his hand twitched on the cover, brushing briefly against hers and sending that shiver down her spine. Smiling even as tears came to her eyes she took it in her free one, interlacing fingers that fit together as if made for each other. He finally stilled, his breathing slowing to only slightly quicker than normal. If she hadn't still been tired and recovering from months in dire conditions she might have noticed a very faint white glow where her hands touched his skin.

She'd lost track of time when someone knocked on the door. She gently freed her hand and opened it, faced with a kind-looking elderly man. Celia was behind him, looking far too sober. _Clearly not_ all _the servants are drinking themselves silly_ , she thought.

"Hello, miss. I'm Dr. Donaldson, can I come in?"

"He's sleeping, has been for a while," she reported as he put his case on the chair she'd been previously occupying. The doctor looked surprised, the expression on his face turning to one of pure incredulity as he took a pulse and temperature.

"Well. This is incredible. What on earth did you do?"

"Just bathed his forehead, talked to him... did I do something wrong?"

"No, no! On the contrary! He hasn't slept as well as this for weeks, not since I was first called to him. His pulse is much healthier, temperature dropped a good few degrees. I think it would be a good idea if you looked after him from now on. I've never known such a rapid improvement."

"You're not angry with me? This room was out of bounds..."

"Her Highness, Princess Belle told me you were in here. I'll still come back when I visit the poor young boy across the hall but I shall leave you to do the majority."

"How is he? My brother," she said by way of explanation.

"He's doing as well as can be expected, the injury is very bad but it is now bandaged and the infection isn't spreading."

"That's good to hear. Thank you, Doctor."

"You're very welcome, miss. Good day." Celia showed him out, but not before Regina caught that look again. This time, she recognised it as that of someone with a hand of cards that could get them everything.


	17. Chapter 17

Over the next few weeks, Regina continued to spend time in Robin's chamber, bathing his forehead, talking to him, sometimes clearing things or fetching fresh water. She learned to take temperatures and pulses, know if the fever was worsening or improving. Dr. Donaldson even taught her how to reapply the bandages and ointment, which involved a lot more touching of his bare torso than she was rather comfortable with. Not to mention the extensive injuries that made her stomach clench in distaste - he'd clearly broken a few ribs and the bruising covered much of his chest and stomach. When Dr. Donaldson did check on him though, he was always impressed at the speed at which the swelling was reducing so she gathered she wasn't doing anything wrong.

There was a tattoo on his right wrist, a black shield with the skin showing through in the shape of a lion. It looked like a knight's emblem, and she knew lions were symbols of strength but why a notorious thief had one on his wrist she had no clue. She forgot about it quite quickly though as she concentrated on healing him.

Whenever he was quiet she'd play with Roland and give him his lessons, in which he was rapidly improving. He'd taken to drawing, and had presented her with a few adorable little scenes, always featuring a mother, father and child. Sometimes he added some vague figures in the background which she recognised as the Merry Men, and once he even added in Belle. Every single one got folded carefully and stored in her bag, which she kept hidden along with her knife, lighting flints and everything else that could be stolen or used against her. She kept him out of Robin's room as much as possible, not wanting to scar the boy more than he already had been.

Every time he came, the doctor would close the window, claiming that fresh air carried disease; when he left she opened it again. Even if it did, it was the middle of winter, and disease spread quickest in summer. She left it open whenever she and Roland went outside, pretty sure he'd heard them that first day, recognised their laughter and come to find them as she remembered the window had been swinging open.

The day he woke up was one of the best of her life so far. They were just coming in, still laughing as they pulled off cloaks and gloves when she'd heard something creak in the other room. Telling Roland to stay where he was she'd opened the door to see him half-sitting up, holding his hands out in front of his face and flexing his fingers. Their eyes meeting through the gaps, his face broke out into a wide grin and she saw him mouth her name. She smiled too before opening the door to reveal Roland, who was listening despite her warning. The boy had run to his father, she lifted him onto the bed before stepping back to give them their moment. Just knowing he was awake and on the mend made her so incredibly happy as she was about to leave them to it. But then he'd made eye contact and held out an arm to her, drawing her into the family hug. All the horrible experiences at sea and afterwards had been worth it, just for this moment.

"Oof, Roland, you're heavy," Robin groaned, shifting his son's weight off his legs when the three of them finally let go of each other. Roland laid his head on his legs and watched them through loving eyes as his father and the closest thing he'd had to a mother met for the first time in months. "Hello."

"Hello."

Neither said anything for a few moments, Regina not sure what to say and not wanting to make any presumptions.

"I'm so glad to see you, Regina."

"You're... not angry with me?"

"Whatever for?"

"Leaving..."

"No, why would I be? That was your decision and I respect that."

"I'm...I'm just so glad you're alive." Her hand caressed his cheek gently without her telling it to. "There was one moment in the forest when I just knew something had happened to you." He laid his hand over hers on his cheek and moved his head to kiss her palm.

"Somehow I knew you'd be right there when I woke up."

"Robin..."

He suddenly let go of her and slowly pulled the drawer in the cabinet beside his bed open, pulling out a small silver locket.

"I do believe this is yours," he said, smiling. Regina gasped.

"My grandmother's locket! I thought I'd lost it." She couldn't believe she hadn't thought to check in there. Opening it she saw the picture still intact; Daniel looked different to how she remembered.

"I forgot to give it back to you that night before you left. I've kept it safe ever since."

"Thank you. You have no idea how much this means to me."

***

He continued to mend, his lesser cuts healed, the major injury much reduced and temperature back down to normal. As yet, no one in the castle knew about the ties between them so they had to keep it a closely-guarded secret, though the servants knew she was looking after him they all thought his recovery was the 'magic touch' the doctor had spoken of to Belle. However, more than once she'd opened the connecting door to find Celia either in their room, "just dropping off lunch/clean clothes/come to tell you something" or outside in the hall, cleaning the door or floorboards. By now Regina was very suspicious but couldn't say anything as she had no idea if anyone else had seen a poster and knew they were harbouring two wanted persons, not even to Robin as she didn't want to worry him and consequently worsen his condition.

He managed to get up for New Year's Eve. Neither of them were considered important enough to be invited to the ball - the King's word had overridden his daughter's wishes - so supper had been brought to them before the feast started. Regina brought hers and Roland's through to Robin's room, where the two were already sitting by the fire with a book.

"I have to say, Regina, you're a very good tutor. He's reading incredibly well, he didn't even know his letters when you joined us."

She shrugged off the praise, feeling slightly undeserving though the compliment warmed her through. "He's a quick learner. Has he shown you his drawings?"

"No, Roland, you didn't tell me you could draw!"

"He can." She nipped out and came back with her now very tatty bag, curling up in the chair beside theirs while the supper stayed warm on a ledge over the fireplace.

Roland blushed and buried his face in his hands as Robin carefully studied the pictures.

"I think this one's my favourite." He pointed to one of the three snowmen she and Roland had built, on the day he'd found them. "You were building these the day I heard your laughter from the window."

She nodded. So her theory had been correct.

"What's this say?" he asked, pointing to the words underneath the snowmen. The firelight wasn't very good for reading, even when combined with candelabras on the mantelpiece.

"Our names. This one's you, look, 'Papa'. This one's Mama and this is me, Mama helped me with the spelling." Their eyes met as Roland continued to explain his uncertainty as to whether to put 'Mama' or 'Gina' and his eventual decision, drinking each other in.

"Well, that's very interesting. Shall we eat?"

Regina uncurled herself and tried to lift Roland off his father's lap so they could eat properly but he clung on. Eventually she gave in to the pleading look in his eyes, putting the tray on their laps instead with the two plates on.

They talked more as they ate, the conversation kept from getting too deep by the presence of Roland. None of them noticed the time until they heard something floating up from the ballroom French windows, undoubtedly open against the heat of hundreds of bodies.

"Ten! Nine! Eight!"

"It's almost New Year," Robin stated.

"There'll be fireworks," Regina told Roland.

"What are fireworks?"

"Big, sparkly things in the sky." She tried to warn him about the noise but he'd already scrambled off Robin's lap and run to the window.

"I'd quite like to see them too..."

"All right, all right. Honestly," she exclaimed, flinging her arm in mock exasperation before helping him up, an arm round his waist to support him as he struggled over to the window. Leaning on the ledge just as the fireworks started, Regina let go of Robin for a moment to lift the boy up so he could see. He sat on the windowledge, each of them with a hand on his side to ensure he didn't fall off and their spare arms round the other. Though she was the one supporting his weight she had to admit she loved the feeling of being in his arms again.

The display was spectacular. All different colours of fireworks: pink, green, blue, white, lilac, plus Catherine wheels and sparkles that fizzed after some of the big bangs. Roland was entranced and so was Regina, but all she could feel were Robin's eyes on her face and his arm round her shoulders. Turning to him during a lull to exclaim how beautiful it was she found herself unable to move, locked in his gaze as he leaned in and kissed her ever so gently.

"To new beginnings?" he whispered, so softly only she could hear it. She was feeling sappy and warm tonight, so her better judgement wasn't very alert. She smiled and rested her head on his shoulder to watch the rest of the display. Roland hadn't noticed a thing.  
By the time the fireworks were over he was falling asleep. Regina picked him up and carried him over to the bed, tucking him in and kissing his forehead. It came naturally to her now, and sometimes she forgot she hadn't known him that long.

Robin was watching her as she doused some of the candles and shut the window against the bitter night air.

"What?"

"You've become a wonderful mother." Regina bowed her head, embarrassed but flattered. Heavy tendrils of hair fell forward to hide her face. Robin reached up and tucked them behind her ear, calloused fingertips gentle against her cheek but her instinct to run kicked in now and she moved her head back slightly.

"We spent several weeks together on a pirate ship. I rather think he'd take to anyone who cared for him during that time."

"A pirate ship? Captain Brown..."

"No. He wasn't a pirate."

"So what happened? We haven't really had a chance to talk since I woke."

"I know. It's not pretty, are you sure...?"

"I can handle it. It'll give me something to think about, some variation from these four walls."

"You might want to sit down for this." She guided him back to the fireplace, drew her chair a little closer to his and went on to tell him everything that had happened, from Roland's reason for running away right up to when Belle had found them. He insisted on reading the stained letter she'd written, though it was completely pointless now, chuckling when she'd revealed with a red face where she'd had to hide it in lieu of pockets. She told him about Captain Brown and his sailors' pursuit of her, cried afresh when she remembered poor Jerry. Relived that awful battle, the murders she committed, the horrible, horrible weeks in the brig, unsure of their fate. Told him all about John's bravery, his injury and berated herself for forgetting about him lately in her concern for Robin. Their struggle through the forest and along snow-covered roads, and finally, she pulled out the poster.

"I'm a wanted woman, Robin."

"I know."

"The worst part is, it doesn't give a sum for returning me. I have a horrible feeling the reward isn't monetary at all, but," here her voice cracked, "my hand in marriage. I don't want that, Robin. I don't want to be seen as a possession. That's the whole reason I left that damned palace in the first place!" Her voice rose hysterically at the end. He reached across and took her hand in his, caressing her cheek with the other.

"Hey. Come here."   
Regina shook her head, not wanting to get too close only to lose him again, but his hand stayed on her cheek.

"Regina..."

"I can't. I just know Cora will find us and..."

"Regina! I love you, all right?" His raised voice stunned her out of the now habitual excuses for pushing him away. "And I'm not going to let that happen. Regina." Her heart fluttered every time he said her name. "I promise you."

"You have no idea what Cora is capable of. She won't do anything to me, but she'll go after you and Roland because she knows it'll hurt me more than physically harming me. She already did it with Daniel. She'll stop at nothing to get what she wants, and in this case, it's to be the Queen's mother because she can't be the actual Queen."

"Regina, listen to me. As soon as I'm fully recovered we'll sort this out. I'm not sure how yet, but I will sort this." He sighed in frustration. "Oh, how I hate being indisposed!"

Regina's voice dropped, voicing her most recent fears for the first time.  
"I think one of the servants is thinking of turning us in. You know Celia? She's been acting suspicious ever since I brought you in from the garden. I've repeatedly caught her listening behind doors. I think she guesses something's not as it seems and even Roland's noticed she's constantly hanging around us instead of working."

"I have noticed she's a little shifty. And I notice Belle's not been around here much lately."

"She's been very busy organising this ball. That girl'll work herself to death one day if she doesn't get too lost in her books first."

"Now, why isn't Celia helping with that?"

"I honestly have no idea. But what happened to you? I leave you standing on the docks and the next thing I know you're barely alive."

"Well. After you left, I stayed at the docks for a while to look for him. I didn't see him get on the ship. I stayed for a good few weeks, then I saw the first of these posters so of course I had to get out. The men insisted on coming with me but I got lost in the forest. We rode at night so chance of detection was less but I took a wrong turning. I haven't seen them since."

"Looks like this mess has caused us both to lose people we care about. I'm sorry."

"Why is it your fault? You couldn't marry the king. Anyone in their right mind would have run away."

"I know. But maybe it would have been better if I'd just stayed out of your lives..." She was cut off by his lips landing on hers, moving more insistently than they had before. After a second she kissed him back just as strongly, long-suppressed passion flaring up as her hands clung to the material of his robe, his hand coming to rest in her curls.

"I love you," he murmured against her lips when they finally came up for air. Her mouth widened in a helpless smile. "And I'm glad you're in our lives, for you're filling the void left by Marian's death."

Regina pulled back in surprise. She hadn't realised that he felt the same about her and Marian as she did about him and Daniel, as much as she'd tried to distance him for his safety. Filling the void was what she'd wanted ever since that first night at Leopold's palace, alone in an over-sized, over-expensive four-poster bed in the middle of a large, draughty chamber. His next words were echoes of what she'd wished for for years.

"I just want you to be happy."


	18. Chapter 18

Regina woke the next morning curled up in Robin's lap, his arm round her waist and her head on his shoulder. Leaning up she pressed a kiss to his cheek, grateful he still had feelings for her but trying to shove down the insecurities that still welled up. She could have very happily stayed there for hours but there was a large possibility of Celia walking in and spreading rumours like wildfire, so she tore herself away. His arm fell from her waist and brushed her hip as it fell into his lap, sending an involuntary shiver up her back.

Roland was just waking when she lifted him into her arms, and he mumbled something into her ear that she didn't quite catch before his eyelids dropped again. Carrying him through the connecting door she was faced with Belle and a breakfast tray.

"Happy New Year, Rebecca. Did you...spend the night in there?"

"We wanted Robin to have some company so we had supper together, then Roland fell asleep and I didn't have the heart to move him," she explained as she laid the boy down on the bed. A funny look passed over the princess' face.

"You're in love with him."

"How did you...?" Regina asked before she could stop herself.

"I can see it in your eyes. And his. He's in love with you." She sighed out the last sentence and Regina smiled as the hopeless romantic shone through. "And you spent the night together..."

"Nothing happened, I assure you!" Regina could feel herself blushing.

"I know that! He's too honourable, and so are you. But I did hear him calling out for a 'Regina' while he was feverish. The name is so similar to yours that I can't help but wonder..."

Regina immediately stepped forward and covered Belle's mouth with her hand.

"Don't you dare tell anyone, ok? I'm wanted by King Leopold," she hissed into her ear. "The reward is unspecified, that probably means my hand in marriage to whoever brings me back." She held up the poster. "And Robin is wanted for helping me. So if you tell anyone, I swear, I'll..." Her argument faded out, and she stepped back awkwardly. She had no idea what to threaten her with, and even if she did, no power with which to make it seem plausible.

"Wait a moment. I thought you were already married?" Regina wanted the floor to swallow her whole. She thought she'd been doing so well and now she'd accidentally blown her cover. Again. She was no good at this living in secrecy.

"No. That was a cover story in order to protect Roland, who is Robin's son. His mother's dead."

"I understand," stammered the frightened girl. Regina felt awful.

 

"I am so sorry, Belle... I'm just so sick of people using me for their own gain."

"It's ok. I promise not to tell anyone. But, can I just ask, are you going to run away together? Get married?"

"I don't know," she replied honestly, hopes she'd dared not entertain sneaking back into her mind.  
"But you do want to, right? If you love him you must get married!"

 

"Oh, Belle. It's not that simple. Life isn't a fairy story. Not all the evil queens are defeated and not all princesses get their happy endings. One day you'll understand. And even if we did run, where would we go? Leopold is probably looking for me everywhere. As far as I know he's got all the neighbouring kingdoms and nearby islands on the lookout."

"I'll scout around for you. You deserve your happy ending. He might have the biggest kingdom in terms of size but he's really no more powerful than all the other kings in this land." Her voice rose to its normal level and took on a more business-like tone. "Your brother is doing well, the infection has gone down a lot and so has his fever. You can see him today if you want."

"Thank you ever so much. Happy New Year."

"And to you." They exchanged a knowing smile as Belle exited but her subsequent exclamation made Regina's heart sink.

"Celia! I was just looking for you..."

Her mind, however, drifted back to Belle's words.

Are you going to run away together? Get married?

Gosh, how she wanted to. There was nothing more she wanted right now than to stop running and settle down with the boy she now saw as her own and the man she never thought she'd love as much as she had Daniel.

But she also had to think of them. Did they even want her as part of their family? Her logical side said yes, they'd accepted her and loved her but the habitual self-deprecation instilled in her from childhood was screaming at her to leave and never come back if it meant they'd be safe. And if she couldn't even remember what she'd told someone as a cover then she'd be no good living permanently outside the law.

 

But before she even brought up the subject she would wait until they were all well, and she'd found John's family. She'd vowed it, even though she hadn't told him, and she would make good on that vow.

But she was getting frustrated with having nothing productive to do. It was too cold to go outside every day, two snowy to go riding even if she did have a horse. Belle was occupied with her work and books, Robin and Roland were still asleep so she had no one to talk to. She left a note on top of the book Roland had been showing Robin, knowing the boy would pad through to his father when he couldn't read all of it, and slipped out into the hall. She decided against going into John's room in case he was awake - false hope is the worst thing to give when someone is ill - and slipped along the corridor to the balcony. Standing at the railing, she tried to guess whereabouts the library would be. Probably up in a tower for privacy, if Belle's quiet demeanour was anything to go by.

Regina eventually found some stairs concealed behind a tapestry off one corner of the balcony. They were narrow, steep and winding, so she kept her hand on the wall to steady herself while her other hand held her skirt up so she didn't trip. Her instincts seemed to have been right as when she finally got to the top, she saw a formidable oak door with iron studs through it. She put her ear to the wood, trying to tell if anyone was inside, but it was too thick. Summoning her courage she put her weight against it and heaved the door open.

The room inside was small, but every single space was occupied with books. Shelves lined the walls, the only light coming from a window in the roof and a few unlit candelabras loitered around, clearly for when it got dark. A comfy chair with a book lying open on the footstool in front of it and some cushions were surrounded by piles of books, some stacked ten high. There was also a small desk, with quills, inkwells and paper all neatly laid out and a miniature grandfather clock keeping time with a rhythmic tick-tock.

This girl certainly doesn't leave anything lying around, does she, Regina marvelled. She didn't even think to look at the volume on the stool, not wanting to disturb Belle's reading; instead she went over the shelves, looking for anything that might help her search for freedom.

Taking down a couple of volumes that looked like they might be helpful she laid them out on the desk and started to read.

As the hours passed, the stack of useless ones by her feet became almost as tall as the ones scattered round the room.

At the end of the morning she put them all back and went back down for lunch, a little frustrated but somewhat gratified that she was actually doing something now instead of just sitting around.

She went back the next morning, only ever going for half a day at a time so she could still teach Roland and nurse Robin back to health. A couple of books were useful, so she read them cover to cover and made some notes on the paper. She was rather surprised that Belle never showed up, considering that it was her library and her space.

 

She came up one afternoon having finished going through the first wall of shelves the previous day. Passing the chair on her way to light one of the candelabras, for it was a dismal day and the light was no longer so bright from reflected snow, she happened to glance down at the hefty looking volume lying open. Inside was a map of their whole land, kingdoms identified by their kings - she noticed there wasn't a single reigning queen - and crabbed writing in the bottom corner reading The Enchanted Forest. A sheet of paper lay over half of the double page, pencil scribblings all over it. Regina smiled at Belle's love for her books - there wasn't a single mark on the page which was clearly so useful.

Sitting down she lifted the book onto her knee with difficulty, running her finger over the markings. She couldn't read maps but on lifting the paper she found the key with all the funny symbols explained. The paper had a crude sketch of the Forest, identifying Belle's kingdom and Leopold's, and all the lands where posters of her and Robin had been found, marked with a large cross. There were a worrying number of those, and Regina's heart sank in disbelief as even the dwarf mines in the furthest reaches were crossed out. There were only two kingdoms left: one in the far south-western corner, almost completely covered by forest apart from a tiny settlement bang in the middle of the trees; and a little island to the north of the land she was in now, a note on the paper identifying the spit over which the only access was at low tide.

"Sherwood Forest." She didn't mean to say the name aloud.

"Re...becca?" Regina spun round, guilt rising in her chest as she came face to face with Belle. She got up hurriedly, almost dropping the book.

"I'm sorry, Belle. I was trying to find somewhere to go and I just saw this..."

"It's all right. I'm impressed you found this room. No one else has, not even Father." She came further into the library, checking outside the door before drawing a tapestry across the doorway, heaving the door closed and bolting it, pulling a dark red curtain across it to muffle any sound.

" I'm actually quite glad you did find it. Saves me having to lug books down, people would get suspicious. Now we can talk in private. I see you found the map."

"It was just here on the chair. How did you find all this out? I've been browsing for days and haven't found anything really."

"I'm a princess. My father has acquaintances in every kingdom in this land, and most of them have daughters who I know just because we all went to a ball to celebrate King Leopold's fiftieth birthday last year. I don't particularly like them but they were grateful to have someone new to talk to, I think. They helped me cross out potential safe places for you to go. I told them he was wanted in our kingdom, so it should have thrown them off that we already know where he is." Belle perched on the arm of the chair and ran her finger across the page. "These crosses are ones where posters have been seen by the royal family. Sherwood Forest hasn't had any posters but I do know that the sheriff is rather anti-outlaws so maybe that should be the last resort."

"Anti-outlaws?" Regina asked warily.

"Robin Hood is a notorious outlaw but hardly anyone knows his real name. That's why we've been calling him Locksley, so fear of detection is less real. Anyway, that leaves this one." She pointed to the land in the south. "It doesn't have a name, it used to but it's been fought over by the Enchanted Forest and Corona for decades. Now it's no-man's-land, but some still live there. I do have one friend from the ball, she lives in the neighbouring kingdom and she says it's the one place where people from both lands live in harmony."

"Neighbouring? Does she visit often?"

"No, not since just after it became ambiguous territory. She visited as a young child and the experience stuck with her, I suppose. She's actually very like you. Brought up to be a princess but much prefers wandering in nature and being outside. She did fall in love with a prince though, which I don't really understand. Oh, come on!" She laughed at Regina's sigh. "It's obvious just by the way you stand that you were born into status!"

"I was the daughter of a lady," she admitted. "You know I'm living under an alias, I can't say any more. The only other people that know are Robin and John, and if I'm honest even that feels like too many for it to be a secret any more." She wondered whether to voice her suspicions over Celia, but as she was clearly a faithful and useful servant Belle would likely defend her right away.

"There's also something else I need to do. If I tell you, will I be able to trust that you won't tell anyone?"

"You've been betrayed before, haven't you. By someone you care about."

Regina nodded, trying not to be swayed by the girl's innocence and seeming understanding.

"How do I know you're not helping me just to lead me into Leopold's trap?"

 

"You don't. But I promise, I know a desperate woman when I see one. You're doing well to have trusted me with as much as you have."

"You didn't exactly give me a choice when you started questioning my name and relationship with Robin."

"I know, and I'm sorry. Curiosity got the better of me. But I'm not like the other royals, they'd do anything for power, status and reputation. I'll help you. I swear on my mother's memory."

That was clearly a pretty serious vow for Belle to make so Regina gave in.

 

"Roland isn't my son, he's Robin's, but you know that. ...Circumstances demanded that we part ways and Roland somehow ended up with me. John isn't my brother either but you know scandal. Say the wrong thing and suddenly you're the worst kind of woman imaginable and everyone will take the word of society against you." Belle nodded.

"King Leopold wants me to be his daughter's stepmother. I met John on a ship I was trying to escape on." She skimmed through the pirates and the origin of his injury to the promise she'd made.

"I want to reunite him with his family. However I have no idea which kingdom he's originally from."

"What's his surname?"

 

"Smith."

"Ah."

 

"You see the problem."

"Yes, it's a common name in a land where 'blacksmith' is a frequent family occupation."

"Belle, don't put yourself in danger for me. I'm not worth it."

 

Just then, the gong rang for dinner.

"We should go downstairs or my father won't be too happy. You take care of your family."

"They're not..."

 

"Maybe not, but family is more than just a shared name. You love them; they love you. Go play with Roland, tell Robin you love him. Don't push them away for fear of getting hurt."

"It's not just me that I'm worrying about getting hurt. It's complicated."

"It doesn't have to be." Belle laid her hand on Regina's arm, smiling as if it was a choice for things to be complicated or not. Regina shook her head slightly.

"But it is. And I can't stop it without a serious confrontation that may cost lives. It's not easy."  
"Look, we'll talk about this later. We need to go downstairs."

Regina followed her, wishing she could warn her how the world worked without ruining the fourteen-year-old's innocence. But 'there was no choice' seemed to be becoming the mantra of her life.


	19. Chapter 19

Robin's chest wound was now completely healed over, and though some of the skin was still the distinct yellowish of old bruising he was up and walking about, making up for lost time with Roland while Regina spent more time in John's room. He was now awake, leg doing well, but he was tired and couldn't hold conversation for long. She read to him a lot, steering clear of stories with ships or pirates in them and focussing on the happy endings. She'd learned positivity can do amazing things, and had resolved to try and put that in practice more often. It was still difficult though, what with Wanted posters up all over the place and Celia still sneaking around.

She and Belle continued to plan various routes in the few half-hours they both had spare, often one leaving notes for the other to check over then consolidating them in long late-night sessions, sometimes running through to morning. Those were the days Regina invariably dozed off when Roland was showing her something or trying to read to her. Not that she found him boring, at all, but she had never been good at running on no sleep.

"She's fallen asleep again." The huffy voice sounded like it came from a distance. "She's bored of me."

"No she is not. She's tired." The voice dropped so low her fuzzy mind could no longer hear it but she knew the gist of what Robin was telling his son.

"Now come on, read to me and let her be." Regina's lips curved up involuntarily as she let the blanket of sleep draw her fully under.

She woke briefly, and far from fully, as she felt herself leave the cushiness of the chair and be carried towards the bed, the firm mattress welcoming her into its embrace as the cover was pulled up to her chin and a soft kiss pressed to her forehead before she went under again.

***

"Good morning," Robin greeted her with a smile. Regina grinned and stretched, feeling invigorated. "You look much better than you did yesterday."

"I think all I needed was a good sleep." Robin got up from the small table in the corner where they'd started having their meals and folded her into his arms. His warmth made her feel safe and secure, but even that security scared her.

"You, darling, have been working far too hard to try and get us to safety. And I really appreciate that, I do, and I would help if I knew where you were disappearing to, but you need to take care of yourself." When had he started calling her by endearments?

She placed her hands on his chest and pushed him away slightly. Being the gentleman he stepped back immediately but his face betrayed his confusion.

"We need to talk about that, Robin. On our own."

"This evening, when Roland's asleep," he promised.

***

Roland was particularly energetic that day, but by dinnertime he'd bounced himself out of puff so fell asleep promptly afterwards. Robin picked him up and they tucked him into his bed, closing the door between the rooms so they had some privacy. Robin sat in the straighter-backed chair, despite Regina's adamantly insisting he take the easy-chair, and pulled it closer to her.

"Now. I promised we will talk about escaping and we will, but first I want to talk about us."

"Us?" The word made Regina's heart leap and her throat thicken, and she swallowed nervously as Robin continued.

"Where we stand with each other. I mean, you leave, which is entirely fair enough and I don't doubt your reasons for doing so, but then Roland follows you. You could easily have tossed him aside, dropped him off at the nearest port and gone on with your journey and your life. You didn't. From what I gather, and what he's told me, you cared for him, protected him, never let him out of your sight if it meant the possibility of him getting hurt was increased. You pushed aside whatever danger there might be to you by staying in this land and made it your goal to get him back to me."

"I couldn't let such a young child lose his second parent before his sixth birthday, could I?"

Robin leaned over the arm and took her hand between his. "Regina, what I'm saying is, you were the second parent he never had. It was unexpected and you had no obligation to do so whatsoever, but you kept him safe and got him back to me unharmed."

"Through pure luck."

"But you managed it. With another injured boy in tow. Two are more noticeable than one but three is just plain conspicuous. Especially when you don't really look old enough to have a five-year-old son." Regina blushed, looking down at her lap in some embarrassment. She felt Robin take her chin and try to meet her eyes but she moved away.

"Regina, darling. There you go, pushing me away again. Why?"

She felt tears prick the insides of her eyelids but blinked them back.

"Because I can't let you get hurt. I just can't. Cora is still out there, and we know she's looking for me. She won't give up until she finds me, even if I was lying dead in a ditch and she was told that months ago. She will find me, it's only a matter of time. You know what happened to Daniel. She'd do the same to you and Roland."

"Then why did you return my kiss so willingly on New Year's Day?"

"Because my head and heart are currently fighting a battle to rival the Ogre Wars!" She swiped her hand hastily across her eyes but a tear still rolled down her cheek. "Sometimes logic wins out, sometimes l..." She swallowed. Her head screamed to push him further away but her heart reminded her softly that she'd already told him that she loved him. And that it was the truth. "Sometimes love."

He sighed her name, the sound like honey to ears recently filled with the heavy silence of the library contrasted with Roland's excited squeals.

"And the escape?"

"My plan was always to get into Corona somehow, where Leopold will have absolutely no influence on what I do. As King, anyway. Now I'm unsure whether I'm planning for just me or all three of us. I will get out of here, I have to, but whether you come with me is another matter entirely. I don't know if you want me in your life completely. Again, head versus heart. And so often it's my head that wins out. Robin, I don't know what to do!"

"Regina," he sighed and reached across to brush the stray tear from her cheek.

"I love you," she choked out. "I do, I love you, but the longer we stay together the more chance Cora has of finding us. Sometimes I manage to forget about that, like when you kiss me, everything else just flies out the window and I believe I can have a happy ending. That I deserve a happy ending." She was literally pouring her heart out now but she couldn't care less. She'd borne the burden for too long and it was starting to take its toll.

"But then, when I'm alone, up in the library or in bed at night while Roland's with you, I start to think maybe I should be finding somewhere else for one of us to go just so we don't all die!" Her voice rose hysterically at the end, prompting Robin to move in front of her, leaning in until he was holding her and soothing her fears with gentle circles into the small of her back. Her arms snaked round his neck, her nose buried in his strong chest and breathing in the comforting smell of forest that still lingered after weeks, if not months of staying in a castle.

"Regina. Look at me." She hesitated before pulling back, his hands cupping her cheeks as he looked directly into her eyes. "I would go to the ends of the world if it meant I could be with you."

"But what about Roland? I promised I wouldn't leave him but even I don't know if I meant until we found you, or..."

"That's one of the reasons I love you," he assured her as her sentence petered out. Her breath hitched in her throat. "A true mother would do anything for her child. And Roland thinks of you as a mother, that much is obvious."

"And I love him. But I'd give it up in a heartbeat if I knew you both were safer without me."

"Look. First, let's find a safe place, that's liveable in, where we can then do one of two things. You can carry on, out of the Enchanted Forest while Roland and I stay in whichever haven you find. Or we all go. We can talk about that when we get there. But first, please let's just get somewhere we know we'll be safe from Leopold?"

"Believe me, Leopold's not necessarily the one you have to worry about."

She could see his logic though so she nodded, glad she no longer had to rely on just her own judgement.

"That's better." He brushed away the last of her tears with the pad of his thumb. "Have I ever mentioned that when you smile you look absolutely stunning?"

"You are such a sweet-talker."

"No. Just truthful. Can I kiss you or would that make your decision harder?"

"Let's put it this way, it'll rack up one tally on the heart side of the scoreboard," she murmured, even as she felt herself pulled to him, touching her forehead to his. They only broke apart when the candle burned out and they realised how late it was.

"We should probably go to sleep." Regina stood up reluctantly, going over to the bed and stopping in her tracks at Roland's adorable little face.

"I'd hate to disturb him," Robin came up behind her. "You know how upset he gets if he's woken in the middle of the night."

"He was - understandably - upset for the majority of the time we spent together."

"What do you say we let him have his first night in his own bed?"

"Robin..."

"Nothing will happen to him. I promise, we'll leave the door open so he can get to us if need be. But he's growing up and he's never actually spent a night on his own. You or I've always been with him and I think we should give him a chance to be independent."

"He's five."

"Got to start them early if it's to have any effect."

Regina gave a bitter half-laugh. She couldn't remember a time when she'd run to Cora for help because she'd always known she'd be called weak, or silly, or hopeless.

"You've got to let go of her, Regina," Robin encouraged in a low voice as he let the connecting door off the latch. "Don't let her dictate your life. You've made the first step by running away, but if she haunts you for the rest of your days then really, what progress have you made?"

"Doesn't feel like I ever made any progress," she mumbled, pulling the covers up to her chin and lying on her side, facing away from him.

"Why do you feel like that?"

"Do you really need to ask?"

"Actually, yes, I feel I do. You're an amazing woman, Regina."

"You know why."

"Look, that's all in the past. You need to look to the future and leave what's happened where it belongs: behind you."

"And you know this how?"

"Because I had to do the same thing when Marian died. I felt like it was my fault, I wasn't there during the birth because the midwife kicked me out. I didn't fight her because I trusted that she knew what she was doing. And she did, but I still blamed her to begin with. And I had to put my actions afterwards behind me too in order to look after my son. You need to do the same. Let go of Snow's betrayal; stop blaming yourself."

Regina sighed heavily, not quite believing that he'd remembered the details she'd told him so many months ago, before rolling over and burying her head in his shoulder, hoping he'd hear what she couldn't find the words for. She dimly felt his arm come round her waist, settling her more comfortably against his side before falling asleep.


	20. Chapter 20

Regina woke the next morning with renewed hope in her heart, helped along by the first birdsong of the year. She'd spent so much time in the library in varying shades of dusk that she hadn't noticed the seasons changing. It was still quite chilly outside, as she found when she went to swing the window open and a gust of cold air swept through the room, causing her to close it again at lightening speed, but the sun was shining and large patches of grass were beginning to overtake the snow.

Her good mood was improved even further by John managing to get up for an hour, limping across the room with her arm supporting him, and the doctor pronouncing his leg fully healed if a little weak from lack of use.

Roland came back at lunchtime from a mid-morning's ramble with a bunch of late daffodils, that Regina initially thought he'd picked from the beds; however, Robin swore they'd gone a little way into the forest. She'd stayed behind in order to spend some time with John - the poor boy had had almost no company in his feverish weeks aside from the doctor's visits and a grudging servant tasked with keeping an eye on him. By gentle coaxing she managed to get his parents' names and the town they lived in: as luck would have it he was from this kingdom and she encouraged him with this.

"We'll find them. I promise."

"I really hope so. I miss them; I don't know if they were told we were hijacked by pirates."

Only a few days later, Celia poked her head round Regina's door.

"Mrs Mills, there's someone here. I think you might know them?"

"I'll be right down, Celia. Thank you." Regina was scared, worried as to who it might be, but she straightened her dress and made her way downstairs anyway. A young woman in her twenties stood on the step, a baby on her hip. She had a pleasant, ruddy face, and a healthy figure smothered by the thick cloak.

"Good morning," Regina greeted them with a smile.

"Hello, are you Mrs Mills?"

"Yes, I am."

"Margaret Smith. And this is Bobby. Is John here?"

"Come in, quickly." She glanced over her shoulder as she led her upstairs. "He's in here." Opening the door, she saw with gratification the looks of pure joy on her face as she saw her brother, and the mirror of that look in his. Regina suddenly found herself trying not to drop a one-year-old as Margaret smothered her brother in a firm hug.

"Maggie?!" he exclaimed as his sister squeezed the air out of him.

"What happened?"

"Pirates," he said simply.

"I knew going away to sea was a bad idea," she shook her head. "I'm just glad you're all right, John."

"You have Mrs Mills over there to thank for that. And the daughter of the house." Regina was impressed he'd remembered her cover.

"Really? You saved him?"

"Well, I..." Regina's words were effectively squeezed out of her by Maggie's arms. Bobby wriggled between them in discomfort.

"Thank you so much."

"It is my pleasure. If it weren't for John we would probably never have gotten off that pirate ship."

"We? Your husband?"

"My son was with me when they hijacked the ship."

"Where's your ring?" she asked, face not altering at all but her eyes changed slightly, now sympathetic even as they chastised. "Please don't tell me you made the same mistake I did."

"No, I didn't." She cringed at herself. "Oh, that came out wrong, I'm so sorry!"

"S'okay." Maggie shrugged indifferently, not seeming to notice that Regina was still holding her baby.

"My ring was stolen by the pirates," she told her, knowing it was unbelievable but relieved when Maggie relaxed at John's confirming nod.

"You're so brave! Isn't she brave, Bobby?" she cooed, finally taking the boy. Regina was saved the awkward response of someone who doesn't feel they deserve the compliment by Belle walking in.

"Belle! This is Margaret Smith, John's sister."

"It is so lovely to meet you!" she exclaimed as the visitor hastily bowed low. "Don't bother about formalities. I don't mind."

"How did you find me?" John suddenly asked.

"I heard someone talking in the marketplace yesterday about a John Smith being here. And of course I knew it was my idiot brother," Maggie affectionately stroked his hair back even as Regina's heart sank. "So I asked the girl and she directed us here."

"Who was the girl?"

"Celia, I think she said her name was? She works here, I believe."

Regina glanced over at Belle, the betrayal clear in both their eyes.

"She does. Would you like to take your brother home now?"

"If he's well enough to travel then yes. We have a cart he can sit in, I can get a message back to Mother and Father. We don't live far."

"I shall call the doctor and ask him to come. He can tell you if he thinks it's a good idea. We'll give you a bit of privacy now."

Belle and Regina backed out of the room and immediately held a whispered counsel in the corridor.

"I could have sworn she knew more than she was letting on. I'm sorry."

"It's all right. I suspected but I didn't want to find that she was a loyal servant therefore impossible to be a traitor. That's why I didn't mention it."

"I'd send her away but then she'd be free to go to King Leopold. I couldn't let her do that to anyone."

"Maybe it's best if we go now. Robin is healed, we've come to an agreement, John's found his family and we're just about there with the route?" Belle nodded to confirm it. "We'll leave tomorrow morning," she decided.

***

They were woken in the dead of night by Belle shaking them and whispering frantically.

"Regina. Robin, wake up!"

"What is it, Belle?"

"Leopold is coming. The gatekeeper just rang the bell to say the King's coach has turned into the drive!"

"They found us?" Regina asked, kicking Robin to wake him up. He fell out of his side onto the floor, but she didn't have time to worry about his bruised behind as she pulled her dress over her head.

"I don't know. But you have to go. Even if they haven't, you can't wait until morning. Here are two dark cloaks, and the map. The servants' entrance will be quicker. There are two horses saddled and waiting in the stable yard with some supplies. Go across the paddock, there's a small path leading into the forest. You'll find it on the map."

"Say goodbye to John for me?" Belle nodded, understanding the unspoken plea to explain. "Thank you so much for everything, Belle." She gave her a brief but intensely grateful hug before going through and shaking Roland awake, a hand over his mouth to muffle any sound.

"Roland, wake up. We're leaving now."

"Why?"

"Shh. Don't talk. Come on." She quickly hauled him into his clothes as Robin appeared, dressed and fully awake with the cloaks and maps in hand. She stuffed the map into her trusty bag before slinging it over her shoulder and lifting Roland into her arms.

"Here," Belle urged, leading them to the servants' staircase by the meagre light of a candelabra. "I have to go and greet the coach, make sure everything's ready. Good luck!" she whisper-shouted; Regina waved a hand in acknowledgement and farewell as they stole down the stairs and out the door. The moon was full so they could easily see their way down the path and into the stable block. Roland clung round Regina's neck, but reached for his father when they got to the horses.

Regina brought the back of her skirt between her legs to form makeshift breeches before swinging up, cursing long dresses and her lack of a seperate bodice into which to tuck the excess material. Robin was already mounted, Roland clinging onto the pommel and his father's arm tight around him. The hooves weren't muffled so they walked until they were on the grass, the sound incredibly loud in the stillness, then kicked into a gallop, leaping the fences and bending low over the horses' necks so they didn't get knocked off by low tree branches.

They galloped until the sun was rising and the horses were dropping with exhaustion. As one, Robin and Regina slowed the beasts to a canter, then a trot, then a walk as they looked for somewhere to sleep.

When they found a grassy clearing, she dismounted, her legs wobbling underneath her. It had been so long since she'd ridden, and while it had come back easily her muscles were protesting fiercely after being unused for so long. Robin lowered Roland, who was falling asleep, into her arms before dismounting himself and untacking.

"Belle has really outdone herself," he exclaimed as he opened the panniers to find horse food and salted meat enough to last a good week. There were also three gourds of water. "Now we won't have to worry about sticking by the stream all the time."

Regina cast her eyes heavenwards in a silent thank you to the girl who'd helped them so much.

"You know I've never been particularly fond of the rich but I have to say, she wasn't so bad. Seemed to be genuinely grateful for everything and willing to do everything in her power to help."

"Oh, she was. She was. Robin, I don't think food is our main concern right now. We'll let the horses onto the grass and just sleep."

Robin looked over at the sleeping boy.

"Are you sure we don't need a lookout?"

"It's not like we'll be staying in one place for long. Besides, we need the energy for riding."

"You're right." A windswept bush provided enough shelter for the three of them. They put Roland between them for warmth, and Regina found it easier now to push aside her fears of getting too close in order to hold onto Robin and keep the heat in for the boy.

A few hours later when the sun was right overhead, over a 'breakfast' of fresh kill and berries (Robin had argued that they should keep the salted meat for more desperate times) Regina studied the map. There had only been one path from the castle to the clearing they were in now and Belle had marked it on. She turned it so North was the right way, and found the little stream. It only went close to the path in places, but she still had trouble pinpointing where they were.

"All right there?" Robin leaned across to look over her shoulder, chin resting on her shoulder.

"I can't find where we are. Come on Roland, eat up."

"I'm not hungry."

"You need your energy. We won't stop again until lunch so you'll eat that or go hungry." Roland huffed but brought a chunk of meat to his mouth. She glanced over to Robin only to see him hiding a smile as he glanced between the map and the landscape.

"Well, I can see smoke rising just over there," he pointed to the gap in the trees just ahead. "And there's a town here. So if we can get there we'll know where we are."

"Really? Do we want to go into civilisation?"

"No. We're just using it as a landmark. We won't go in, but around. We'll be fine, Regina." He took her hand, somehow knowing that she needed it right now.

Half an hour later they were on their way, having fluffed up the grass to hide their presence, watered the horses and refilled their gourds. This time, Roland chose to ride with Regina, and she felt a stab of nostalgia for the days when she was first getting to know them and falling in love with the life they'd created together with the Merry Men.

"Robin, what happened to your men?" she asked as they trotted alongside each other.

"I honestly don't know. Either they got back to Sherwood, or they were caught, or they're still on the run. I suppose I'll never know."

"We could go to Sherwood instead. It's closer."

"No." He spoke with a finality that Regina didn't want to argue with. "I'll only put you in more danger. The sheriff's been after my head for years."

"I'm sorry." He reached across and squeezed her hand that held the reins in thanks. She was glad he didn't blame her, because the blame could very easily and logically be placed on her.

"It's all right."

"Come on. There's an opening not far ahead."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A gourd is an old-fashioned water bottle which was made out of animal skin. Like the one in Season 1 which Charming uses to collect the water from Lake Nostos for Frederick.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mild warning for Leopold being a possessive bastard and Cora being Cora near the end. Warning continues through the last few chapters just for the knock-on effects but I hope it's not too bad...

They slowed to a walk as the trees petered out, not wishing to attract attention as the walled town loomed about two hundred metres ahead. The clock above the gate was striking one, and floods of people streamed in and out with carts laden with produce for market. Lambs squealed and chickens clucked like their lives depended on it, and geese marched down the middle of the road in two-step. Regina fought her way out of the crowds and onto the grass verge at the side of the road while Robin pulled his hood up and continued on ahead to check the name of the town so they could locate themselves on the map. Knowing that being still would arouse suspicion she kept her horse walking slowly, not letting herself be dragged back into the flow of people.

"Why are there so many people, Mama?"

"It's market day. People come from all the neighbouring farms and villages to sell and buy things they need for the next week."

"Can we go?"

"Not today, Roland, I'm afraid. Papa's just gone to check where we are."

Roland shifted a little on the saddle. She was sitting as far back as she could but sitting two people to a single saddle was uncomfortable at the best of times.

"I prefer the old saddle."

"I know." Jerry's saddle had been incredibly comfy for long rides, and she missed it. She tried not to think about it lying at the bottom of the ocean for the fish to feed on. The horse she'd been given by Belle was fast, pretty gentle and very beautiful to look at, but his gait was much rockier than Jerry's and he was slightly more easily spooked. The saddle was smaller too as he was a lighter build than Jerry had been, so she and Roland were slightly more squashed.

Regina halted in a wider part of the road, a passing place for the people going against the flow, to wait for Robin. He seemed to be taking an inordinate amount of time to check the name on the gatepost and she was starting to feel conspicuous.

"Excuse me, miss, but could you tell me which town that is?" A hunched-over woman was standing at her stirrup, face hidden by her hood. The road suddenly seemed very empty.

"Err..." Regina took her time checking the map and hoping either that Robin would return soon or that they were where they thought.

"I'm not local to these parts but my map says..." Just then, the woman pushed her hood back and straightened to her full height, managing to look down on Regina even though her head was a good few feet below hers.

"Mother?!"

"Hello, dear."

"How did you find me?"

"There was a lovely girl working at King Maurice's castle, very helpful in answering my questions. Celia, it was. Did you know her?"

"I knew it."

"I am ashamed to call you my daughter." Cora's voice was deadly calm which only made Regina more nervous. She was very aware she had a child in her arms, whose body had instantly tensed when Cora had spoken.

"Couldn't you have done this a little more privately?" Regina asked in a hushed voice, trying hard not to glance up for Robin and give him away.

"Oh, but I couldn't wait until then," she bared her teeth in a false smile that just dripped with venom. "I couldn't wait to see how my only child had grown. Into a liar, an adulteress, and a lowly peasant... Everything I taught you not to be."

"That is not fair. You forced me into an engagement I didn't want!"

"For your own good! You would have run away with the stable boy. You can be so much more than a poor man's wife, having to scrape for a living. You could be Queen."

"She doesn't want to be Queen, Lady Lucas." Robin appeared at her side, looking a formidable force on his black gelding and a look on his face that quite frightened Regina. His voice was just as condescending as the woman's he was talking to.

"And who is this? The scandal you will cause, travelling with another man and his child, no less. You are an engaged woman, Regina."

Regina's hand shot out without meaning to, gripping Robin's arm and pleading with him through her eyes. Her horse shifted under her; she'd forgotten to let go of the reins and the bit was pulling at his mouth. Robin's steady blue gaze and slight nod told her he'd fight for her, and that scared her more than anything now her mother was actually here. She shook her head but his gaze became more persistent.

"Very well. You wanted somewhere more private? So be it." Cora waved her hand and all four of them were whisked away, landing in King Leopold's presence chamber in his palace in front of the man himself. Their horses had disappeared; their supplies along with them. Her father was there too, and the joy Regina felt at seeing him was bittersweet as they all knew this encounter wouldn't be good. He came over and hugged her tight, kissing her cheek, but she was forced to let go by Roland whimpering and clinging to her skirts. Robin stepped beside her and gently encouraged his son to bow; Regina curtseyed. When they straightened Robin moved Roland behind them and Regina tore her eyes away from her father - whose expression was a mixture of confusion and fear - and back to the situation in hand. Robin's hand moved from his son's head to her back for a brief moment, but she pushed away the warmth flooding through her as it did every time they touched.

"Robin, get away. You'll only get hurt!"

"There's nowhere really for us to go, Regina."

"Remember your fiancé, my dear?" Regina shuddered. Leopold was looking her up and down like one would size up a pig for sale at market; Henry had become expert at schooling his face in the presence of royalty.

"At least you had the decency to curtesy. Have you forgotten poor Daniel already?"

"Mother, don't."

"And the princess you saved?" Snow popped her head in as if on cue and ran to Regina.

"Hello, Regina!" Regina clenched her fists behind her back, the old anger welling up inside her again but nowhere near as strong as it had been a year ago as Robin subtly moved his hand to her back again.

"Snow, go back to your room. Regina will be in to see you soon."

"Yes, Father. See you later," the girl smiled, her too-pretty face looking just like a doll's as she slipped out and shut the door, waving at the Lucas women as she passed. Cora's face twisted into a tight-lipped smile that was still more genuine than any Regina had ever received from her.

"My Lord Lucas, will you go and keep my daughter company? She has been expressing some discomfort over her spelling of certain words." Henry stood still, gaze once again locked with Regina's.

"The King gave you an order, dear," Cora reminded him dangerously. He bowed and backed out of the room, and Regina suddenly felt a lot less safe.

"Are you and this man married?" Leopold spoke up suddenly, still eyeing her up and down.

"No. She honoured your 'engagement' as far as that is concerned. Should I really be calling it that?"

"Robin..."

"He didn't ask you, thief."

"Tell me, your Majesty, Lady Lucas, is it really an engagement if the two parties who made the agreement are not the two parties concerned?"

"Of course!" she spluttered. "Who are you to question the law, Robin Hood?" She held up a poster in her hand, a triumphant look on her face. It was one of the posters offering a reward for Regina.

"Don't look so surprised that these exist. I saw you on that raid. I saw both of you. I'm not stupid."

"We never said you were."

"Robin, be quiet, please!" Regina muttered. She had a hand on Roland's head behind her back, trying to keep him calm even as her own heart thumped painfully against her ribcage and tangible fear rose in her throat.

"Milady, I have been married before, also to a woman whose previous engagement was arranged. In that case it was her father who claimed to know whom she'd be happy with. She didn't feel engaged to the man, and who knows what would have happened if she'd had to follow it through? My Marian was a wild spirit, she would have gone off the rails. You're doing your daughter a huge disservice by forcing her to marry the King." His voice changed from deadly assertiveness to mockingly false realisation, as if following a train of thought. Regina could almost picture him on a podium in front of a group of villagers, rallying support. "But wait, you're not doing this for her, are you? You're doing it for yourself. That's why her name is Regina. 'Queen'. I understand now. Don't look so surprised, milady." Robin echoed Cora's previous words, 'milady' now dripping with sarcasm. Only this time it was far more sinister than the jokes floating around the Merry Men's camp. "I may be a thief but I did have some education. I can read and write, for one. I also know that the Queen signs official documents with R after her name, in order to denote her status and save time."

Cora had been gradually boiling throughout his whole show of bravado and his point about being educated sent her over the edge.

"How dare you!" A purple snake of smoke erupted from her hand as Cora lifted Roland into the air, choking the life out of him. The boy clutched at his neck, unable to even cry out.

"ROLAND! Mother, put him down. Please!"

"You should have learned a long time ago that pleading doesn't work with me." Cora's face was one of mercilessness: the same one that had crossed her face the moment before she ripped out Daniel's heart. Robin was now lifted into the air too, eyes defying Cora even as he struggled to breathe.

"How can you let her do this?" Regina turned to Leopold, instantly regretting it as his expression became predatory. "You are supposed to be a kind and fair man..."

"I promised I would have you for my bride and when I promise something, I make good on it. After all, I am a kind and fair King." His last sentence mocked her words and the belief of the whole kingdom as he snaked his arms round her waist, pulling her in close to him. Too close - his touch made her want to throw up. She suddenly realised how close the door to his bedchamber was as she struggled.

"Regina!" Robin managed to shout before Cora tightened the hold on his neck. Roland was by now going purple in the face, and her fingertips started to tingle.

Before she knew it, she'd sent out a white blast of magic, throwing Leopold and Cora to the ground and breaking her spell. Robin fell to the floor and Regina just managed to catch Roland before he landed on the stone slabs. He was unconscious, but still breathing; her attention turned to her hands and she suddenly got up, moving away in case she hurt him with the magic that she could still feel bubbling under her skin.

Cora recovered quickly and got up, not even fazed. Regina was so preoccupied with the realisation that she had what she'd so hated growing up that she didn't notice her mother walking over to Robin until he shouted in agony. She looked up to see Cora with his heart in her hand. Bright red, pure.

Not again.

He shouted again as she started to squeeze it, Cora's eyes locked gleefully on Regina's as she sent long pulses of pain through his body, never fully crushing it but taking pleasure in the horror-stricken look on her daughter's face. Leopold sat up slowly, anger in his eyes and a twisted smile on his face, as if this were some sort of entertainment. Regina saw red again. Her hands shot out, a blast more powerful than the first and strong enough to stun Cora this time, her grip loosening on the heart. Before she could recover Regina had picked it up and gone hesitantly over to Robin.

"Regina..."

"I don't know if this'll work but I'm going to try it anyway."

"I have faith in you." She pressed the pulsating heart into his chest, over the place she'd so often rested her head. He winced, but it seemed to work as he didn't die, or disappear in a puff of smoke or something else just as horrible. His hand came up to cup her cheek but she turned away, getting up quickly.

Cora might have seemed old to Regina while she was growing up but the woman was tough. She recovered within a minute, then helped the king stand and regain his dignity.

He straightened his clothes and crown with frustrated movements, before striding over to Regina and gripping her elbow.

"You'll pay for that. That could be classed as treason but I'll be willing to overlook it if you promise to obey me as your King and master." A guard stepped forward, holding a cushion on which sat a box she'd seen before. She barely had a chance to register the sympathy in the eyes of the otherwise steely face before the King shoved the slightly-too-small ring onto her finger without any pause to care if it was hurting her. He suddenly pulled her far too close and claimed her mouth, his stinking breath mixed with the taste of expensive wine making her want to throw up. She shoved at his chest to try and get him off her but he only pushed himself closer until the taste clogged her ability to breathe, gripping her hips so hard it hurt.

He finally let go when Cora cleared her throat, and she heaved air into her lungs, trying to rid her mouth of the lingering sourness and stop her stomach churning.

"Go and tell all those it may concern that the wedding will take place tomorrow at noon."

Cora gripped her elbow before she could do anything and pulled her through to a chamber adjoining Leopold's, where she was forced into a nightgown as sounds of struggling were heard from the presence chamber. An elaborate white gown hung on a mannequin in the corner; the sickening sound of a fist connecting with jawbone resonated from outside the heavy oak door.

"What's happening? Robin?"

"In jail for his crimes. He will be tried tomorrow."

"Roland?" She knew Cora wouldn't volunteer the information, and she had to know.

"A deserving family will take him in, who will ensure he doesn't follow in his father's footsteps."

With that, Cora swept out and locked the door behind her, leaving Regina to dread the coming of dawn.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Re-reading this reminded me once again just how much I loathe Leopold and Cora...

Regina tried her hardest to sleep, knowing her every move would be on full display when morning came, but she could still feel Leopold's horrible mouth invading hers and every time she closed her eyes his hands roamed her torso again. She had a vague idea of what the wedding night entailed, and just the thought of having the King's ageing body naked above her was enough to have her reaching for the chamber pot.

She'd been tossing and turning for hours, tears rolling freely down her cheeks as she cursed her vivid imagination, when she heard the door open and the bent figure of an elderly man walked in. Fear instilled itself in her heart, thinking Leopold was coming to anticipate his marital rights. She wouldn't put it past him: he had, after all, kissed her viciously in front of her own mother and a five-year-old, no less.

"Regina, it's me. It's your Father." Regina reached out into the darkness, her hands making contact with the bald patch she knew Henry to have and her heart relaxed again.

"Come. I won't let you marry the King." He helped her up and handed her a cloak and shoes before going to open the curtains and window. She instantly recognised Robin's silhouette as he hung off the wall by a grappling hook, and she had never been so happy to see him. The fact that he was meant to be locked away bypassed her as Henry helped her out the window, settling her on Robin's back. Tugging at the hateful ring she managed to manoeuvre it over her knuckle, the tight band leaving a mark, and threw it past Henry into the room.

"What about you? Mother will kill you."

"Don't worry about me. All I care about is that you are happy." He leaned out and pressed a final kiss to her forehead. "Go, my child. I love you."

"I love you too, Father."

As he retreated back into the room and slid the casement shut Regina knew she'd never see him again.

Robin lowered them gently to the ground, expertly unhooked the grapple from the wall and took her hand, running before she got the chance to speak.

They dodged through shadows, keeping to trees and as out of sight of the castle as they could until they reached a black stallion saddled pillion. Roland was sitting on the ground, well out of the way of its hooves, his hands clutching her bag that Cora had taken along with the clothes she'd been wearing. Regina didn't have time to wonder how he'd gotten it before Robin lifted her up onto the rear saddle, her skirt somehow sorting itself out so it wasn't bunched around her hips, then swung up and pulled Roland up in front of him. She locked her hands round his waist as he kicked the horse into a gallop, trying to replace the horrible memories, but even being this close to him wasn't enough as fresh tears fell down her cheeks.

She didn't get a chance to even touch his face until they arrived at a small roadside tavern, the proprietor very annoyed at being woken in the middle of the night. There was only one bed available, so they all had to squeeze in together. But before Robin could get in on the other side of Roland after blowing out the candle, Regina fisted her hand in his shirt, desperation lacing her voice as she knelt up on the bed.

"Kiss me."

"What?"

"I-I need you to kiss me. Please, Robin," she begged, and he seemed to know what she was getting at as he gently cupped her face in his hands, leaning down to capture her upper lip between his, slow and gentle. She kissed him back desperately, hands clutching at his shirt, his shoulders, holding the back of his neck to pull him closer. His tongue ran along her lip and she let him in, not even caring how far this went, she just needed to forget the King's touch.

"Regina," he warned before pulling away. "Careful."

"Sorry."

"Is that better?"

"A little." She felt embarrassed now, the heat creeping up into her cheeks as he kissed her once more, briefly, goodnight.

"I love you, never forget that," he told her before walking round to the other side of the bed. She lay down too, her arm around Roland's already sleeping form and Robin's arm reaching over to drape loosely across her waist.

And despite the fear she felt for her father's life she felt safer now than she'd ever been.


	23. Chapter 23

Despite being in Robin's arms and feeling relatively safe she woke shaking a few hours later, the image of her father's head separated from his body burned into her mind's eye.

This happened every night for a good few weeks, and try as Robin might to soothe her fears away she still worried. As they travelled from obscure roadside inn to obscure roadside inn she found herself thinking about Henry a lot, wondering what had happened. As a result, she was always tired, always upset, over-reacting whenever something moved behind her. Robin told her one of the guards who'd taken him to the dungeon - and who'd carried that awful ring - was sick of working for the King but he wouldn't let him leave, so had agreed to pass as Robin at the trial and afterwards. It didn't make her feel better as Cora was sure to notice, not to mention point the finger at Henry for letting them escape.

She woke screaming one night whereas before she'd been woken by Robin before she could scare Roland. He immediately took her in his arms, murmuring comforting words into her ear as she sobbed.

"I saw my father again. He was being beheaded for helping me and so was the guard and then Cora realised it wasn't you and I..." She swallowed.

"I ruined all these people's lives, Robin. If I hadn't left Father wouldn't have risked his life to save mine and neither would that poor guard."

"Regina. Listen to me. It's not your fault. If it's anyone's it's Cora's. Don't blame yourself, I know it'll be easier said than done."

Regina scoffed half-heartedly.

"The landlord told me something earlier that I was going to tell you in the morning as you were so tired."

"I'm not weak, Robin."

"I know. I was tired too and I didn't want to mess up details that I might have heard wrong. 'Robin Hood' has been hanged for treason, the main charge being the murder of the good King's fiancée on the night before her wedding."

"The bastard."

Robin was silent - his shock at her choice of language was palpable in the air as she tried to justify herself.

"He dragged your name through the mud again."

"Think of it this way: no one will come searching for us. We can start completely afresh, in a new land, and no one will try to turn us in for a price because they think we're dead."

"Very true. What about Father?" she gulped.

"Alive. Apparently the King and Cora have some semblance of heart."

"They have no heart whatsoever. What little he has locked away is dedicated to his daughter. But they won't convict him for helping us?"

"No."

"I was so scared they'd kill him."

"I know. You're very lucky to have such a selfless father."

"I know. Sometimes I wish he'd stand up to Cora more though."

"Cora?"

"I don't consider her my mother any more. How could a mother do what she did?"

"I suppose she was just trying to do what she thought was best. She didn't go about it in the right way, and I by no means think she was right in anything, but we will never know her true motivation. Children come first when you're a parent."

There were a few seconds of silence before Regina rolled onto her back and slipped an instinctive arm round Roland.

"Hey. You're already doing a better job than she did. At putting the child first, I mean."

"Goodnight, Robin."

"Sleep well." He pressed a kiss to her temple.

"Night, mama." Damn. She'd thought he was asleep.

"Goodnight Roland."

After that the nightmares faded, but Robin still ensured she always fell asleep safe in his embrace. It was almost like he couldn't bring himself to let go of her, having almost lost her so many times. She felt the same pull to always be touching him in some way, whether it was holding his hand when the road got too slippery for them to ride, resting her head on his shoulder as they cantered along, giving him just one more kiss goodnight.

The muscle pain of endless riding soon kicked in, making her even more tired though she tried to put on the brave face Roland needed. She was sometimes able to forget about it, like when they passed a particularly beautiful field, which was fairly often as spring was now well established. She could also forget that she was still dressed in only a nightgown and cloak, Robin not wanting to risk stopping at any sort of establishment apart from those who would be used to eccentric travellers. Her magic hadn't made a reappearance, which she was very grateful for but she still feared that it might come at the worst time, like at the border, and be the reason she couldn't be free.

"It must be something that's triggered by someone you love being hurt," Robin reasoned when she wondered why it hadn't stopped Leopold kissing her. "I suppose if one is feeling a bit self-deprecating and hasn't full control over it it might not work on oneself." That last statement was said with a definite severe undertone to it.

"That woman brings out the worst in me," she'd sighed before snuggling closer to him in the bed and closing her eyes.

She woke one morning to yet another unfamiliar room, sun streaming through cracked shutters onto wonky floorboards. She craned her neck over her shoulder to see Robin looking at her with love in his eyes, and the wonderful feeling of being safe flooded through her again as she realised he'd let her sleep in this time.

"I was waiting for you to wake. Shall we get going?"

"Where exactly are we?" she asked as Roland was woken, their few clothes pulled on and some money retrieved to pay for their lodging from the purse Henry had given them.

"We are right..." he pulled out Belle's map and studied it for a bit, "here. We're almost there, Regina." She looked at where his finger was pointing, and the border to the little no-man's-land they'd been aiming for was only a couple days' ride away.

"It'll probably take another day or so to find the village, but just think. Two or three days." Her face spread into a wide smile, the first genuine one since they'd left Belle's, and she leaned up suddenly and kissed him, slower and more gently than she knew she'd been kissing him lately. His hands found her waist as she broke away and wrapped her arms round him, head over his heart.

"Freedom," she whispered, the word sweet on her lips but sounding almost too good to be true after everything they'd endured to get here. Pulling back she met his gaze, getting lost all over again in the clear blue of his eyes as his hand ran slowly through her hair.

Then the dark patch on his wrist that had been revealed when the sleeve had been pushed up by the bag caught her eye, and she laid a hand over the ink curiously.

"Robin, where did you get this? I saw it when you were ill and wondered but never got a chance to ask."

"Ah. That. I got it years ago when I was but a lad, fighting in some of the smaller skirmishes of the Ogre Wars so they didn't reach Sherwood. I must have been fifteen or so when they started, maybe younger. The tattoo I got at twenty-one, to celebrate my coming of age. The lion represents courage and honour. It was my commander's emblem. I admired him a lot, but I was a frivolous boy, no clue as to what being a good man meant. I thought getting it would make me like him without having to try. It didn't work; I turned to theft when my parents died, stealing from anyone for my own pleasure once I had enough to live on. Then I met Marian, fell in love. Formed my code. After she died it was so hard not to fall back into my old ways, I struggled, did some...things...that I am not proud of. Roland gave me some hope that things would get better but that void was never quite filled. Then you quite literally hurtled into our lives..." They both half-chuckled at the memory, "...and I felt complete for the first time in years."

The look in his eyes as he finished talking was completely open, trusting, loving, and the best part was, she didn't feel scared by it. She didn't feel the instinct to run away for fear of Cora finding him.

"Well, I'd say you turned out pretty well," she murmured, realising for the first time his own journey behind where he was now. There was still so much to find out about each other, and the prospect of learning it all excited her. He didn't speak, just slid his arms carefully round her waist. She could sense his nervousness but her haunts stayed away, and she put her own arms round his shoulders, holding him close as he relaxed and buried his face in her hair.

"You know, this used to scare me. This...security. Knowing nothing would happen. It scared me out of my wits."

"Really?"

"Yes. Until about five minutes ago. I've decided now, Robin. I want to stay with you and Roland, that is if I'm still welcome?" He pulled back, blue eyes searching brown, hope and doubt mingled in his piercing gaze. Regina nodded, and a wide smile broke out on his face as he ran his fingers through her hair.

"You'll always be welcome. There was never any doubt about that in my mind. And your father and I are on the same wavelength."

"How so?"

"We just want you to be happy."

Regina smiled helplessly. "That's all I've wanted for years."

"I was a little worried in those dungeons that I would never be able to get you out of here but then that guard happened to be sent to give me my last meal."

"Yes, how exactly did you escape the dungeon?"

"I wondered when you were going to ask that. When Graham came in he quickly whispered his plan, then we changed clothes. The sentry on duty just thought I was being difficult and didn't even turn around. I got past him easily, then ran into Henry, dear fellow, who'd come to get me out. He'd already somehow rescued Roland, I have no idea where from. There was no time to share stories. I have to say, that man is resourceful."

"He's a Lord, of course he is. He just never used them before because there was no need."

"He gave us the purse, got your bag from where they'd confiscated our belongings, had the horse waiting, grappling hook ready, and persuaded the guard to let him into your room to see his daughter for the last time before she got married. And the rest, as they say, is history."

"How ironic," Regina noted sadly.

"That it was the last time he'd see you or the last time before you married, but irony in that it's not the King?"

"Last time he'd...what?" She searched his eyes, jaw slack with surprise.

"Will you be my mama for real now?" Roland's hopeful voice piped up from the pallet bed in the corner, having obviously heard their exchange. Regina looked up at Robin, trying to tell him without words that she didn't expect anything like that just yet, but his hands left her back anyway to open a pocket on his belt. Holding her gaze he revealed a simple gold ring; Regina's breath hitched in her throat as he struggled to find words.

"I..."

"I know, Robin. I know." He didn't need to say anything: she could read it all in his eyes.

"Regina...will you do me the honour of marrying me?" he finally settled on, the simplicity of the ring and his words appealing to her much more than the heavy rock Leopold had given her.

"Yes, I will," she replied without hesitation, smiling so hard her cheeks hurt as he slipped the ring easily onto her finger and pulled her into a tight hug.

"You're my mama now," Roland giggled as he skipped across the room, gripping her hand with both of his to look at the ring, his eyes agleam with excitement. "It's so shiny!"

"Not quite yet, dear. But I will be."

She looked up at Robin, brushing her thumb along his cheekbone.

"When I said I wanted to stay with you I didn't mean that as a hint to propose," she murmured. "We could have waited till we got there."

"Would you rather I hadn't?"

"Would I have said yes if that was the case?" she smiled and leaned up to kiss him again, eliciting an indignant squeal from the boy.

"Ewww!" They broke apart laughing and gathered their meagre belongings, Robin slinging the panniers over his shoulder and Roland giving Regina the puppy-dog eyes to be carried downstairs. As they went, Regina couldn't help but wonder something.

"How long have you been planning that?"

"I don't know. I found the ring at the docks actually and just had to get it."

"But when did you know...?"

"I suppose you could say I knew right from the start. Just took us a little while to realise that we weren't just ships in the night."

"Us?"

"I too thought I'd help you to the docks then never see you again, though I couldn't help but hope. Especially when you and Roland had that instant bond."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

He hugged her as best he could with Roland clinging to her, and kissed her jaw subtly just before they left the rickety curtained staircase for the draughty front hall of the inn.

He paid the landlord, saddled up the horse which she had dubbed Ebony a few days before - despite Roland's dismissing it as 'girly' the name had stuck - and rode on, all now with a smile on their faces.

They had to sleep under bushes for the next couple of nights but Regina didn't care. She was with the man she loved, engaged to him no less, with a stepson-to-be who was just so happy to have a proper mother that he insisted on her riding at the front so he could be in her arms. Robin had clearly told his son not to expect her to stay when he'd rescued her from the castle but feeling his arms around her waist now she knew there was no danger of her going anywhere.

They walked the last mile or so before the border to give Ebony a rest before the miles of thick forest they knew they'd have to get through, Regina carrying Roland when he got tired and holding his hand the rest of the time. The border was a mere signposted fence with a gate wide enough for a narrow cart, no guards that might be looking for them. And best of all, no massive crowd of people heading towards it. Robin led Ebony through; Roland skipped after him, turning back when she stopped short.

"Come on, Mama!"

"What is it, darling?"

"I don't know. It just seems too good to be true."

"Regina, love. You deserve this." He held out his hand; she slipped hers into his calloused one, interlinking their fingers; Roland took her other one and she stepped over the border into this new, nameless land, a helpless, truly joyous smile breaking out on her face. She had no clue what they would find in the village, no clue as to what or who might stop them from building a house and a life there, but she did know one thing. The prospect of facing it with Robin and Roland by her side was the happiest future she'd faced in a long time.

She was free.


End file.
